Another Crunchy Mom

Sleep Logs

2010-10-21T12:06:00.003-04:00

So I need something to keep me accountable as I try to regain some control over Everly's sleep. Ironically the last post I made in here was about my desperation. Clearly something has to change!

Everly is still waking up 3 times every night and sometimes four. She wants to nurse and nurse and nurse when she wakes up. When she is sleeping she is pushing me over and insisting on pressing her bum (barebum) right up on me. If I move too much it wakes her up and she is angry. Maisie sleeps on my other side and luckily she is really easy. Everly also wants to nurse A LOT in the morning.

I tried nightweaning her... but it was HORRIBLE!! She basically would lose her mind and I would have to take her down to the basement while she went crazy. After a week of that I was going to lose my mind from lack of sleep and stress so I gave up.

After reading a bit of the No-Cry Toddler book I have decided to put her little toddler bed next to mine, and encourage her to sleep in there so at least we don't wake each other up when we move. At night I am going to do the pull-off technique described in the book. I started this a while ago and it did seem to help. I also say "roll over" as a cue for her to finish.

I am moving her bedtime up as suggested to 7:30 and trying to keep the room darker.

For Maisie I am going to try to get her sleeping in the side-carred crib, and to not let her nurse to sleep. Only let her nurse until drowsy. She basically does this most of the time anyways. For naps I need to get her sleeping in her bed.

Night #1

Everly went to bed just before 8 but didn't fall asleep until after 8:30. We only read one quick book because she said she was tired. Her bath was pretty exciting so perhaps that wound her up a bit. Jeff brought her in to me and I briefy nursed her and she went into her little bed. I think she woke up and went back in one more time. At 1:30 she nursed and wouldn't go back in at all. Although I am against rewards I do think we might need to implement something in this situation.

Maisie

She fell asleep for what I think should of been the night around 6:00 but woke up when I had to pass her off to Jeff. Then she was up from 8-9:30 crawling around and being cute. She fell asleep and I pushed her to the other side of the bed. She woke up 2-3 times to nurse. I need to keep better track! Once Everly is sleeping better I want to see if I can gently encourage Maisie to drop one feeding at night. She is on the chubby side so she can handle longer stretches.

Back after almost a year

2010-10-21T11:54:00.002-04:00

I can't believe it is nearing a year since I touched this blog. Life just got too hectic. To sum it up... we decided to move. Our house was on the market for a couple months which was so hard. Trying to keep it clean and look after Everly AND be pregnant. UGH! Finally it sold and we found a new home close by... but it needed a kitchen reno.

I had my beautiful baby girl Maisie at our old home on May 26th. It was all I could hope for. I almost didn't call the midwives in time because I was so comfortable in the tub. I gave birth and seconds after my mom and Everly were there in the room sharing that special time with me. I wish more women would consider the home birth option. I wish I had done it with Everly.

A few weeks later we had to move our of our home but our new house wasn't ready. So for all of July and most of August I lived with my SIL, my parents and up at my parents cottage. Poor Everly was having SO many meltdowns it was really tough. Luckily Maisie is a super easy going baby so that made it easier.

Mid-August we moved into our newly renovated home, and got settled. I love our new home! Everly started in the Casa program at a Montessori Preschool in September, 3 full days a week so that I can work from home and have time with Maisie. She seems to be enjoying it. She has made a lot of progress with knowing her letters and their sounds. It seems like she really enjoys the sandpaper letters. :)

Everly is still a TERRIBLE sleeper, which is what has lead me to come back to this blog. I need something to keep me accountable as I try to get both my girls sleeping soundly in a gentle way.

I am scared

2010-01-22T10:27:00.003-05:00

Everly has been waking up EVERY NIGHT since August. This was when her 2 year molars started coming in. The last one came through 2 weeks ago and she is still waking up. Granted there have been a couple of better nights but overall I haven't seen an improvement. I should be clear that she has slept-through the night maybe twice ever... and I am fine with that. What I can't handle is her waking up and screaming, and wanting to eat, and watch TV etc.. That is what is scaring me so much.

Two nights ago we were up for 2 hours while she threw a huge violent tantrum because she wanted to watch TV. I just sat there with her in the basement, trying to stay calm, then crying and then finally she calmed down enough she would allow me to nurse and comfort her.

I feel so incredibly alone in this. I have posted several times on MDC about it and mostly get no responses. My husband is totally unhelpful with this kind of thing and in fact just makes me feel more stressed out about it. However in order to keep him calm I feel like I can't show my concerns and fears. I have 18 weeks until my due date!!! If Everly doesn't start sleeping through the night.. or rather staying in bed all night I don't know what I am going to do. I think I could handle it if my husband had his own sound-proof room to stay in, so I didn't have to stress about him feeling stressed.

Since I am mostly a stay at home/ work at home mom I have always felt it should be solely my job to parent Everly at night. Of course there are times my husband will help out but mostly I try to let him sleep so he can function at his job. The problem is even when I am doing it all myself if Everly is screaming no matter where you go in the house it will be heard, so then I am left feeling I am not doing a good enough job.

I just don't understand how she can be so incredibly easy and sweet during the day and then nighttime is HELL!

On the same team

2010-01-18T13:22:00.003-05:00

Although we have our fair share of tantrums and difficult days, overall I feel like Everly and I are on the same team. Lately I have really tried to keep this in mind at all times, and it is making things go even more smoothly.

When we are out at our various activities a lot of the time I see parents struggling to get their kids to cooperate. They use yelling, threats and time outs... and each week things don't improve. I often wonder if that would be me if I hadn't come across the Dr. Sears Baby Book, which opened my eyes to attachment parenting and from there to gentle discipline. I have read so many awesome books that have helped fill my parenting tool box, so I feel better able to cope with the difficult times.

Now that Everly is getting closer to the preschool age, discipline tends to come up more in conversations with other moms and I often have a hard time joining in. It seems most people use time outs and/ or punishments. I usually just smile and nod. I am not the type of person to launch into a mini-lecture on why punishments & rewards don't work, or what my approach is. If someone asks me directly I obviously tell the truth.

So what do I do when Everly does something that might warrant a time out in someone else's house? First of all if she is really mad and out of control I give her time and space to calm down. Adult or child, who is able to absorb information when they are feeling so upset? Once she has calmed down we will talk about the incident. For example if she hit me because she was mad that I wouldn't let her play with sharp scissors, I will first explain that I love her and that I don't want her to get hurt and sharp scissors could hurt her. Let her know I know it made her mad but she can't hit me and that it hurt. Then I will ask her what she could do to make me feel better... and she will almost always apologize and give me a hug. I don't know if this is the perfect GD way of doing things, but it has worked well for us, and at this point Everly will often apologize on her own once she has calmed down.

In terms of other "naughty" things like drawing on the carpet (UGH!). We just point it out and explain that she can't do that because it might not come off etc.. She actually does seem to listen and a lot of the time she won't repeat the "offense". Usually in these situations I am to blame for example I left a marker out when I knew she has been tempted to draw on "unapproved" surfaces.

I feel really positive about how we are dealing with Everly right now and feel like the bond her and I share is extremely strong.

Not So Spirited

2010-01-18T13:12:00.002-05:00

Everly has always seemed a bit more alert, energetic and intense then most of the other kids we encounter. At the same time I usually have been able to keep her happy and cooperative while we are out. We have only had 1 bad tantrum (so far) while out in public and it was easily explained (she was tired and hungry).

I had read a lot about the book "Raising Your Spirited Child", on mothering.com and after 2 difficult weeks with Everly at home I went out and bought it. Of course the two days before I got it were good ones... and it seems her last tooth has come in and she is as sweet as can be.

Anyways after reading the first 2 chapters, I was pretty confident Everly is NOT spirited, so I don't think I will read the whole book. There is some great info in it though and I definitely read the chapter on tantrums which reinforced everything that I do. Basically it encouraged you to first of all try to avoid them by knowing your child's triggers. If one occurs you should stay with your child and do what you need to do to help them come out of it. For Everly that means just staying close by until she starts to wind down and then offering hugs and "boo boos". If I try to touch her or talk to her while she is in it, it makes things much worse. It felt good to have my approach reinforced.

The other chapter I enjoyed was on intensity and how to help lower it. Some of the suggestions were play-dough, which we play with often, sensory activities (like water, sand etc.), reading, back scratching etc. I found this all really useful because I do find that Everly is more balanced when we have enough down time each day. It is easy to forget about when you have a kid that is so energetic.

I would definitely recommend this book for anyone who thinks their child might be spirited (more intense, persistent, hard time adapting to change etc.)

Concoctions

2010-01-14T12:36:00.004-05:00

Currently there is nothing Everly enjoys doing more then making concoctions. I try to avoid giving her a drink with dinner because inevitably it will end up being the base for "soup". Every chance she gets she is squirting soap or cream into containers.

My approach to this has been to hide away all the soap, cream etc. from her reach so I don't have to say no. I am torn between setting up a table with lots of stuff to concoct, and trying to avoid encouraging this. My thinking is this, concocting is a creative thing and I want to encourage her creativity. She enjoys it and I am sure she is learning about volume, texture etc. while doing it. At the same time I don't want her thinking concocting anything and everything is OK, and I have noticed that if we avoid a certain activity eventually it loses it's allure. I suppose I will lean towards doing some structured mix making for her, and just be really diligent about hiding away things I don't want her messing with.

The video from above was taken one morning. I went upstairs to put my hair in a ponytail and left her playing in the living room. Our kitchen was pretty messy and had lots of inviting things on the counter. So I came down to her making "ice cream" for her best friend Amelia. It was so gross!! Anyways I just asked her about what she was making and then redirected her to another activity. I don't see the sense in getting mad. Everly is a smart cookie but I can't expect her to not get into stuff, when I leave it out. I just have to make a note to self - "clean up kitchen unless you want a bigger mess to clean up!"

Home Birth

2010-01-14T12:12:00.002-05:00

When I was pregnant with Everly I did a ton of research on pregnancy and child birth. After all my reading I knew that I wanted an all natural birth with no interventions unless absolutely necessary, and that I would prefer a home birth. Well I go the all natural birth but my husband was really against a home birth. At the time he said it was because we were in a small condo with paper thin walls.

Now we live in a town house with thick walls and lots of space comparatively. My husband is still really apprehensive about a home birth, but in my mind that is what I am having. We are going to go to a home birth seminar at the midwifery clinic, and hopefully that will get him on board.

So why do I want a home birth?

1./ I don't want any pain medicine or other interventions the hospital might have to offer.

2./Labour tends to be quicker. You are at home and comfortable.

3./ I will feel more in control. Last time I basically lost my mind when I got to the hospital and totally lost control on my pain management. Luckily I was only there for 3 hours before Everly was born.

4./ Less exposure to germs

5./ I won't have to endure a painful car ride while in labour, and won't have to wait around until I can pee to go home. Last time it took 3 hours after Everly was born before I could go because I couldn't pee. I was able to pee a little bit and that got me out but when I got home I had no problems.

6./ I can just relax after the birth in my own home.

Hopefully everything goes well and I am able to have a home birth. Everly's labour was really hard but other than the cord being around her neck (which is very common) everything went smoothly.

My Amazing Girl

2010-01-08T15:40:00.003-05:00

Everyday I am amazed with what Everly says and does. I wish I could share her accomplishments without coming across as bragging. I want to keep track of her milestones, so here are her most recent ones.

The other day she woke up and informed me that she wanted to "do learning... to learn ABC's mommy". I started to sing them and she got furious and said she wanted to do them by herself. She is getting pretty close to reciting them correctly at this point. I try to point out letters as much as possible and she likes to play starfall as well. It is great because she can fully navigate the site now on her own (well the ABC section).

She now understands what reading is... at least as much as she can. She knows what words are and that I am reading them while we read books. She will point and ask me what they say. She will also sometimes point to a "D" word and ask if it says "Daddy" and same with several other letters ie/ A-Amelia S-Siri obviously E-Everly. When we are out in public she will pointe out E's and say "E for Everly", and be quite happy to see random E's. I am in no rush to teach her to read but since she is interested I will point out words that come up frequently in a book and tell her what they say. Then when we turn the page I will ask her to find that word. She enjoys doing this.

She is also constantly asking "how many is this?". Then she will hold up her fingers and show me some random amount to see if that is how many. She sometimes will count objects up to 3, but when she tries to count objects she usually races ahead. She is starting to count up to 14, but will leave out one or two numbers. She can point to two objects versus, three, and vice versa. Same with one, and I think she is starting to recognize a grouping of 4. I mostly just read number books to her and count objects with her. Sometimes I will group things and get her to pick out a grouping of 2 etc.

I think what is the best about Everly right now is how much she is talking and what a little ham she is becoming. She has said a few times "I make people laugh". She enjoys finding new ways to make her friends and family laugh. She will suddenly cross her eyes on purpose, or make a silly face or say something funny. Sometimes she will just talk and talk and talk about things and she is always saying "remember that mommy"... and will recall things we have done in the past.

I am so interested to see how baby #2 is compared to Everly. I have taught some sisters who are quite similar in what they are good at and their personalities and some that couldn't be more different. The only thing I am PRAYING baby #2 will do differently is be a better sleeper!!! YIKES!!! Everly hasn't slept well in 5 months, since her 2 year molars starting coming through. At least we will be done with that by the time #2 arrives!

It's a Girl!!

2010-01-08T15:33:00.003-05:00

Today we found out that we are having another baby girl!! I am over-the-moon. I really wanted a little sister for Everly, and always dreamed of having two girls. Everly has been very adamant that the baby is a girl, and has actually expressed that she does not want it to be a boy.

We had a run in with a boy she did not like at gymnastics, and when I told her the baby might be a boy she said "mommy... remember that boy gymnastics?" OMG! I couldn't believe she would make a connection like that and that playing with that boy would put her off. :P

I am so glad that this baby is due in May like Everly and that I have all the clothes this baby will need for quite some time. All I really want is a couple new infant toys (non-plastic), an ergo and a baby swing. Oh and a couple of matching outfits for Everly and the baby! :P

I am now 20 weeks along and feeling so much better!! I am SEEING our little girl move now which is fun, and I am finally feeling less nervous about the whole thing. I am still waiting to have a real pregnant belly but it is starting to take form. I think come February I will finally really look pregnant... which I love.

Gymnastics

2009-12-18T10:15:00.008-05:00

This fall I decided to enroll Everly in the rec centre "kindergym". Which is basically a really laid back gymnastics class. She loved it so much I decided to enroll her in a "real" class at a gymnastics club. The rec centre class is pretty much a free for all. The kids do what they like and play together. I love that about it. The club class is very structured and the children must do a warm up together and then do different circuits.

The first few times I took her to the club class she really didn't listen at all, and I had to constantly keep her on track, while keeping it all fun. On Monday we had our last class and it was so amazing to see the difference. She didn't take her eyes off the instructor and did the whole warm up with only one reminder (to do bunny hops instead of runs). She was just so fully engaged.

She gets so excited for both classes now and it is amazing to see what she is able to do. She is so coordinated - much more so then many of my 4 year old students. It will be interesting to see if she is just an early bloomer or if she will always be so coordinated. She can do the beam all by herself and she does it quite quickly. Her forward rolls are easy for her now. I am just encouraging her to stand up right after, because that does take some strength on her part. On the trampoline she is starting to be able to land on her bum and back on her feet, which I don't think they even bother teaching for another year or two.

She is always asking about taking ballet lessons. We are holding off on those until next year because for one there isn't a convenient class with a good teacher, and two I just don't think she is ready to follow that much structure. We dance at home most days, and for now that is enough.

I never thought I would put my kids into ballet, but Everly is totally taken with it. I also get almost free classes at the studio's I teach at, and with money being tight it means she gets to do something she loves without breaking the bank.

I think it is really important for kids to develop their coordination, strength and flexibility right from the start. Enjoying being active is really important to me and I hope both my kids find something that they love participating in. That way they are more likely to want to stay active as adults.

Baby #2

2009-12-13T16:27:00.004-05:00

Well... I was intending on blogging after our busy summer but then I got PREGNANT!! Everly will be a big sister end of May/ early June just after she turns 3. I am really excited... and nervous.

It has been extremely rough since I first found out I was pregnant. First the morning sickness hit me before I even got my BFP, then a few weeks later I had the flu for two weeks, and just when I started to feel rested again I got bronchitis, which turned into the most horrible sinus infection that I finally seem to over. All the time this was going on Everly has been getting her 2 year molars and waking up SCREAMING, and inconsolable at night. I feel like I have barely had a chance to think much about this pregnancy or enjoy it. I am 16 weeks and still not showing at all so I don't have a bump or movement to make it feel real.

I am hoping that come January everything settles down and we can get back into some state or normalcy and work on preparing Everly and our home for our new arrival. I would really like to nightwean Everly and have her sleeping in her own bed. I want to make things as easy as possible on us all when the baby arrives.

I have a great midwife and I am hoping DH will agree to a homebirth. He has been pretty against it but the midwife is very supportive and I hope with her help I can get him on board.

"Reading"

2009-09-27T12:35:00.005-04:00

I have been avoiding my blog because I feel pressure for it to be interesting, have pictures etc. I have decided I am just going to blog for me and not worry about what I am saying or if it is a "good" blog.

Everly is simply blossoming and I am realizing that I really have to start talking to her and treating her differently. She seems to understand SO much and I think I have been underestimating her.

We dropped the doing a theme for each week and I have just been really mindful of using language that will help her learn. For example I try to constantly mention colours, how things work, what season it is etc. This approach is working beautifully. The week we did the letter A and the colour green she learned orange, and purple, and started recognizing several letters that did not include A. Thus the end to any sort of structured approach.

During that week I noticed that she is able to match letters with ease. So I thought I would just see if she could match words. I wrote Mommy, Daddy, Everly and Nanny (her grandma) each on 2 pieces of paper. I told her what they said and she matched them with ease. Of course I was really proud and she seemed to enjoy it so we played word matching with other words. The next time we did it, she didn't want to match... she wanted to "read" all the words to me. I couldn't believe that she could remember all the words!! She doesn't even recognize all the letters of the alphabet. She does have a harder time deciphering words that start with the same letter but she can do it with a bit of thought.

For my own record she can now recognize:

Nanny
Mommy
Daddy
Everly
Amelia
Siri
Kathy
Faraz
Grampy
Nanny
Batman
Bum Bum (sometimes)
Ballet (sometimes)
Baby (sometimes)
Madelyn

She now brings me blank cue cards and asks me to write words on them. I write whatever she wants (that is where Bum Bum) came from. :P Then we decorate them with stickers and she writes on them and finally she will cut them all up.

I guess for now I will just keep writing words on cue cards for her if she wants, and I also thought she might benefit from my pointing out environmental text, like STOP on stop signs etc.

I found a leap frog Fridge Phonics and Word Whammer for $20 on craigslist. I am going to pick them up tomorrow. I thought it might help her learn the sounds of the letters, in a way that is fun.

This has also renewed my interest in Starfall which I think I will let her do a few times a week.

I don't want to be some pushy mom, but at the same time I want to make sure I am creating a rich environment for her. I know I always mention this but it is something I am always worrying about.

OPPS! I uploaded the wrong video.. and after waiting 15 minutes it is going to stay right here.

Here she is dancing. She is totally obsessed.

Books

2009-09-04T15:00:00.002-04:00

I was reading through some of the older blog posts on Chasing Cheerios the other day, and she mentioned reading 30-40 books to "O" everyday. Here I was pleased that I read to Pooks everyday, and sometimes 10+ books. Anyways it got me inspired to really up the amount of books I read to Pookers daily. It has been a week and it was REALLY renewed her interest in books. She is asking me to read to her more and when we do read she wants MORE!

Yesterday we did about 25. Some of the stories were quite long and others were short and sweet. I am trying to make a goal of sitting down and reading 5 at a time. I am really enjoying the calmness that comes from reading with her. There are a lot of frustrations when you are two and this really gives us a chance to just chill out and spend quality time together.

Here are some of the books we like reading:

All the Frog and Toad books

Angelina Ballerina (I don't care for them but she loves them)

Grumpy Bird

Kids research books on animals - right now Alligators.

Bill & Pete Books

Guess How Much I Love You

Anything by Sandra Boynton

Beatrix Potter books

Nursery Rhymes

Now we are reading so much more we are going to have to get more books from the library or I will go crazy with all the repetition. We got a great fable book from the library and she has really enjoyed that.

Speak of the devil... Pookers is calling.

Best Friends

2009-09-03T15:42:00.003-04:00

Something that can't be measured or compared, is social confidence (for lack of a better term). This is really on my radar because I was a fairly shy kid, who became a horribly shy and anxious pre-teen. I always knew I wanted to do everything I could to enable my children to be as outgoing as they could be and have the confidence to be who they really are.

I just love watching Everly now when we go out and about. She is incredibly outgoing and charismatic (she takes after her Dad!). She seems to be able to win adults and children over in minutes. We have a 4 year old who lives across the path from us. We live in a townhouse where all the cars are parked underground. Everly and A have become best friends. When I watch them play and interact together it just amazes me how much Everly keeps up with her friend. Not in terms of what she knows, but in terms of how to interact with another person.

She might not be able to recite her ABC's and 123's, or know all her colours... but watching her with other people reminds me that there is so much more to learn than just "school skills".

Natural Consequences

2009-09-02T16:08:00.004-04:00

I have recently seen too great examples of how natural consequences work.

1./ Everly was painting. Which turned into Everly painting her hands. I decided to tidy up the kitchen and had my back to her. When I turned around there she was COVERED in paint all over her face. Honestly I didn't really care that much. At the same time it isn't something I want to encourage. I grabbed my camera, filmed and took a couple pictures and fairly calmly took her upstairs to hose her down. She did NOT appreciate having her faced washed. After we talked about how if you paint your face it will mean having a shower, and getting water all over your face. Today she tried just painting her nose, and I reminded her about how we would have to clean her face and she stopped.

2./ Everly and a friend got into some cream. I found them with some on their bodies and faces. They friend seemed shocked that I didn't get angry. As I was trying to decide how to deal with the situation, Everly got some cream in her eye. I was able to point out that that was one reason it is not a good idea to play with cream without a parent around. They agreed and gave me the jar they had hidden.

The one thing that I am having a hard time with now is when I am around other parents. Mostly my neighbour who's daughter is 4. First of all her daughter is older so she does have higher expectations, but she also seems to have many more rules then we do in general. Their home isn't close to as kid friendly as ours is, so there are a lot of rules to protect furniture and carpets. The thing is sometimes I start feeling like I am too permissive when I spend a lot of time with them. I know she is sometimes surprised with the things I don't worry about. For example I let Everly play with water in her kitchen. Which usually means water will get on our floor, area rug and even couch. Not enough to cause alarm or anything. A few times she seemed shocked that I didn't seem to care.

I let Everly paint her hands, her rubber frog and a polly pocket. It just doesn't seem like a big deal to me. If she wants to do that that is fine. I won't let her paint her cloth dolls obviously. And when she is painting she has to stay in her chair. I guess I just have to remind myself I do set boundaries... I just like to give Pooks lots of room to be a creative kid.

Homeschool Preschool

2009-08-24T14:37:00.002-04:00

Generally I do believe that unschooling works. I love reading unschooling blogs and any info I can find. I also feel that there is no need for preschool... however I have decided to do a very informal "preschool" with Pookie. Now that September is just around the corner we can get back to having a more scheduled week.

So here is my plan (mostly inspired by www.letteroftheweek.com):

Each week I will make a poster board with a letter, colour or shape and a theme. This week I chose the letter A, the colour green and alligators. I got some alligator books out of the library - both children's fiction and a couple of children's reference books. I have printed some letter A colouring pages and I printed a picture with all sorts of green objects.

So my plan is to point out the colour green whenever I can, dress her in green and give her some green things to eat. I also thought we could do a green photoshoot a la "Chasing Cheerios".

We have read some of the alligator books, and my next thing is for us to go on a 'gator scavenger hunt to find all the ones we have in our house. "Alligator Pie" will also be our song/ poem of choice for the week.

I have a few letter games we will do (if she is interested), and I will let her do the letter A on starfall.

Also each week I am hoping to come up with a gross motor skill, fine motor and montessori inspired activity. I have a one-to-one correspondence activity for her this week. I am also going to offer the scissors daily this week, and I got her a $2 golf club and ball to play with.

All of this is meant to be fun. It gives us something to do and hopefully DD will enjoy her "school". I am also hoping it will make it easier if we were to actually HS... but that is a whole other topic!

I am going to keep a notebook and try to fill it out each day and make note of what we did in each "subject" area. Already I noticed a change in how I think when Pooks and I interact. For example today she was eating some raisin and I would give her 1, 2 or 3 at a time and ask her how many their were. She really enjoyed counting them and eating them up. DH and I are also back to 'hugging for the count of 10'. We especially love this one because we get an extra long hug out of her!!

So in love

2009-07-29T16:18:00.002-04:00

It just blows my mind how I my love for Everly just keeps growing. Whenever I look at her my heart just wants to burst and sometimes I am compelled to attack her with dozens of kisses and hugs, which usually gets her giggling. Sometimes she will attack me back with a whole bunch of little pecks. I love how when I say "I love you" she says "I love you too mommy" and sometimes "Daddy loves me too".

I am constantly amused with her antics and personality. It just never seems to grow old.

Of course we have our moments where she throws fits or is just totally and utterly 2. For the most part I can even laugh those off... although sometimes I do feel like I am losing my mind. :P

Adventures in Tandem Nursing

2009-07-25T22:20:00.002-04:00

I am almost finished this book and I really enjoyed it. I have had it since Everly has under a year, but now that we are in TTC mode I thought I would crack it open. I really like that it is actually more about adjusting to a growing family and finding balance. I would definitely recommend it for anyone who finds themselves pregnant and still breastfeeding, or for anyone who is planning to be in that position.

Part of me would really love to experience nursing two children at once and watching them bond that way. The other part thinks it might be easier if Everly weans herself while I am pregnant. I guess the good thing it whatever happens will have it's pros and cons, and either way I can be happy. I do talk to Everly about how when there is a new baby she will have to share "boo boos" and now sometimes while she is nursing she points to the other one and says "that boo boo, baby" and nods her head in this really serious way. A few months ago if I pretended to nurse a doll while she was nursing she would get quite angry and now she wants to share.

Reading this book has gotten me really excited about TTC... before I was much more reluctant. I just hope it doesn't take too long. With Everly it took 2 goes, so it is hard not to expect it to happen relatively quickly. Also I got pregnant in August with her, so there is a part of me that thinks I will get pregnant again in August.

The good thing is if I don't get pregnant it means I have more time to put into running and building up my weekly mileage. So at least if I don't get pregnant there is always something to ease it.

Painting Feet

2009-07-25T22:17:00.004-04:00

One day while I was doing laundry I went out back to see what DH and Everly where up to. There DH was painting Everly's feet and legs, arms and hands. She LOVED it. He was also letting her paint him. I loved that DH would do this with her. They also painted the deck... in tempra paint. Which is still there a month later. Oh well everytime I see it I feel happy thinking about the two of them out there doing this together.

I Like Bugs!

2009-07-25T22:11:00.003-04:00

I really would prefer Everly to be the kind of girl that isn't scared of bugs, will play with a dump truck, likes sports etc... She loves to hold the worms we find in our garden, and she has a few plants that she can lift up and find potato bugs under. She LOVES tending to her potato bugs. She will pick them up and show them to anyone who walks by. She puts them back and will water the plants. Unfortunately there have been a few casualties. Apparently slugs are actually pretty delicate. We have been working on "gentle", with some results. The funny thing is we were at the Zoo and there was a big spider (in a glass box) and she REALLY didn't like it. I couldn't really blame her... it has a huge harry tarantula!

We also watch ants when we are out, but she does like to destroy ant homes. Anyone seen "Ant Bully". Everytime she kicks and ant hill I think of "the destroyer!"

Squirting Water

2009-07-25T22:01:00.004-04:00

Everly LOVES to squirt water from a "squirter". It was driving me nuts having wet couches, floors etc... so finally in desperation I grabbed two bowls. She really seemed to enjoy aiming the water into the bowls. I also let her take it outside and squirt whatever she wants. This one is good for strengthening the muscles in the hands.

Water Transfer

2009-07-25T21:57:00.005-04:00

This one was OK. It would be a lot better with real eye droppers, but mine have gone missing. Everly needed help getting the syringe to work (it is tough even for me), but she really enjoyed filling up the flowers with the coloured water. We got this ice cube tray at Ikea for $1. I also use it to put tempra paint in. As she gets older I am hoping we can use this activity more to see how combining colours makes new colours. We have also done this one with a big turkey baster... again not ideal, but she really does love the turkey baster!

Little Artist

2009-07-25T21:49:00.003-04:00

While we were up at the cottage earlier this summer there wasn't much to do other than draw and paint. For weeks Everly had been obsessed with asking me to draw her happy faces... which I was kind of reluctant to do because I wanted her to draw for herself and in her own way. So low and behold she painted her first "happy face" while we were up there, and when we got home her happy faces grew arms, legs and hair. It is so neat to watch her draw her people now. She isn't always into doing it but sometimes she really does very recognizable people. Other times not so much. Today she also drew snakes and she draws rain as well. Not bad for 26 months... which is actually how old I was when I drew my first happy face!

Of course I had to run out and get her an easel which has been well used. It is in the middle of living/ dining room but I wanted it to be easily accessible. We got ours at Ikea for $20. I was drooling over the Melissa & Doug one but it was $100 and really not THAT much better than the Ikea one.

Busy and distracted

2009-07-25T21:25:00.005-04:00

Lately I have been busy with summer activities, my sister's wedding and other distractions... namely thinking/ planning TTC. Most of my internet time is being spent over at fertilityfriend. But I want to attempt to get back into the habit of blogging. The main reason being it motivates me to do new activities with Everly.

We spent the early part of this week up at my parent's cottage they rent in July. We finally had some nice weather. I went up earlier and it was terrible. It is really hard being cooped up in a tiny cottage with a 2 year old, and 3 other adults. This week Everly spent most of her time in the water. She is a real fish. When I take her to the pool she is experimenting with going "under a teeny bit". She also is reaching her arms out in front of her and you can see that she is testing her buoyancy. If she is over her head I put water wings on her and she loves it and squeals "I swimming, I swimming." It was really fun watching her enjoy the same beach I did as a child. I can't wait to take her to Florida (condo in Naples) in a couple of weeks.

She was also the flower girl at my sister's wedding and did SO well. She walked down the aisle by herself and threw (and I mean THREW) the rose petals 4 times. Once my sister came up front she started getting restless and my amazing SIL grabbed her (I was the matron of honour and DH was a groomsman). She may reprise her role as flowergirl this weekend as they are having another ceremony (Persian).

Soulemama = Creative Family

2009-06-27T19:52:00.003-04:00

WOW! I couldn't believe it when I opened Creative Family and realized it was written by one of the blogs I follow. It is listed to the right of this post. I haven't been there in a while so I guess I didn't put 2 and 2 together.

Anyways here is her link.

More Books

2009-06-27T12:45:00.002-04:00

I am getting a lot more reading done these days. It is so nice to be able to get through a book in a decent amount of time. Today I went to the library and got 4 books:

The Creative Family: How to Encourage Imagination & Nurture Family Connections

I Love Dirt (nature activities)

Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline (on the MDC GD booklist)

And a book on teaching preschool - I thought i might get some ideas from it.

I think I will start the the Creative Family book. It looks really good. I opened it up to a picture of a wooden kitchen all set up with places to hang dish towels, aprons. It looked like what we are going for with Pookie's kitchen.

I just finished Under Pressure by Carl Honore. I just LOVED it. Although I read a review claiming he was too extreme, I actually thought he wasn't as extreme as other books I have read. It is the kind of book a more mainstream person could get through. I feel like I got so much out of it. I will definitely be reading his other books. I also like that he is Canadian!

Big & Teeny... shapes and colours

2009-06-26T12:32:00.003-04:00

I couldn't resist posting this picture. This was taken at my mom's house. As usual Everly was full of her usual antics. :P

I always read over at MDC how children learn without being taught. Just by working thing like, colours & shapes into your everyday conversation can be enough. There are times when I feel like I am not doing enough, but then something will happen to take the pressure off. I noticed a couple of weeks ago that Everly was starting to refer to some things as "teeny". I didn't think much of it. Then it dawned on me that she might really get the difference between big and little. I started asking her some easy questions like "what is bigger a flower or a tree". I kept making the questions harder. It amazed me that she could distinguish slight differences in sizes. My husband was skeptical but she can easily say which person is bigger. My husband and I are only 3 inches difference in height with similar builds and she knew he was bigger. I also wondered what she would do with someone tall and slim, versus someone shorter and rounder. She always picked the person that was truly bigger, not just taller.

This has really inspired me to make sure I refer to thing by their size, shape and colour etc. I have found the best way to help her learn colours is painting. I let her pick the colour of paper she works on and ask her what colour she would like more of, etc... she seems on the verge of really knowing the colours. For the most part she can point to the right colour if you ask but she can't always think of the name on her own.

We have also been painting shapes on the sidewalk with water. I was also surprised that she seems to be starting to grasp shapes. These things really don't interest her but she loves having me paint the shapes and she doesn't mind a couple of questions like "which one is the triangle".

Nothing is more fun than water play

2009-06-22T11:42:00.003-04:00

I love reading Chasing Cheerio's blog but sometimes I just have to accept that Everly isn't that interested in a lot of "activities". She LOVES painting these days, and will sometimes do a puzzle with me but for the most part the most fun thing is playing with water.

I try to offer her different ways and places to play with it. Sometimes we will her baby bath that we never used up out front and she splashes in there and pours water everywhere. This morning I had her out back on our deck (our backyard is only a deck), with a bowl and she watered the deck for a good hour. She will play with it at the kitchen sink and pour and pour and pour, or she will play with it at her kitchen. She also loves painting the sidewalk with water, as do the neighbourhood girls.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that it is OK to let her do what she loves, and that there is lots to learn from water play. One of the great things about going out front is one of the other neighbour girls often comes out and will play with her and playing with other big kids tops water in terms of fun!

New Job

2009-06-22T11:35:00.002-04:00

I think I mentioned before that my aunt had to let me go as she decided not to continue with her business for now, while she adjusts to the death of her husband. I had about a month off and then got a call from her that a friend of hers was looking for someone.

This friend is such a upbeat, positive, go-getter. She hired me after talking on the phone and I have been working for her for the past month. What is SO wonderful is that she works from home and has no room for a desk for me so I have to work from home too! I am adjusting to it. It is hard to be diligent and work when Everly is napping or any spare chance I get. I am thinking that once my mom gets back from the cottage I will ask her to continue to watch Everly on Tuesday's so that I can have a day to work, every week or so. I also like the idea of Everly staying close to my mom. My mom has been basically her sole "babysitter" since she was a few months old, and they have a real bond.

The only downside to this arrangement is blogging time is hugely down!! I should be working right now actually but I figure a few minutes to blog isn't the end of the world.

Back to being TV Free

2009-06-17T16:02:00.004-04:00

My husband has been working so hard to get our new bamboo flooring put in upstairs. Somewhere along the way I started letting Everly watch more and more TV because it enabled me to help Jeff. Then it started becoming a habit. Suddenly Everly turned into a TV monster and wanted to watch it endlessly. I felt SICK. I never intended for her to watch it at all. She would scream TTTTVVVVVVVV, and I would just give in.

Anyways now that the weather is so nice it has been SO easy to put a stop to her TV viewing. My goal is to keep her TV free during the week, and if needed she can watch a bit on the weekend. If she asks for it I let her try and turn it on. I turn off the PVR/ TIVO box so when she switches it on nothing happens. She has been excepting this and we go off and do other fun stuff.

It feels so good to be back to no TV. She seems happier and I know I am. I don't think that letting your child watch some appropriate TV is a horrible thing, but the problem I have with it is limiting it. It seems much easier to make it a once in a while thing, rather than a daily activity. Also the bottom line is there are so many wonderful things you can do instead of watching TV.

Gross Motor Skills

2009-06-17T14:28:00.003-04:00

It just dawned on me that Everly seems to be focusing on improving her gross motor skills. Once she mastered walking, she became very interested in fine motor activities. Now she has mastered many of those activities and seems to be moving back to gross motor. Of course I always try to offer her lots of opportunities to use both, but since the GM seem to interesting to her, I have been trying to come up with fresh activities for her.

Being a ballet teacher I have been the huge difference in motor skill abilities of children. Especially very young ones. I have had 4 year olds who can barely jump off the ground, or run, and 4 year olds who can do single skips easily... and with pointed toes. I think as with most things part of this is nature and part is nurture. Being well coordinated and athletic to some extent are important to me and I want give Everly a chance to develop these skills.

Here are some ideas I have come up with to do with Everly.

1./ Couch Balance Beam - I remove the back pillows of our basement couch and let Everly walk along the narrow (about 2 inches) hard back of the couch. I hold onto her pants so she can basically do it on her own. This is obviously great for developing balance and core muscle strength. As well it works on trust between us because she has to trust that I will be there to catch her if she loses her balance.

2./ Forward Roll - A year ago my young cousin showed me the way the gymnastics couch taught her to do a forward roll (somersault). I put down a mat and tell Everly to reach to the sky. Then she puts her hands on the floor near her toes and I tell her to look at her belly button. I assist her with the impetus to get the roll started. By using the hands on the floor it protects the neck. She did about 10 today. She especially likes watching me show her!

3./ Scissor Kick - I showed her how to put your hands on the floor and then kick your feet one at a time off the floor, so that for a brief time both feet are off. She loved doing this one. This is great for upper body strength and will help with learning a cartwheel later on.

4./ Pony Galops or double skips - This is a ballet step, and is how most children "galop" when they are little. Basically you jump into the air and one foot and then the other come up a kick your seat (or in the case of little ones come just off the floor). With young children we pretend to ride pony's and jump over fences. I usually say "up up" to help them get the rhythm. I was surprised to notice that Everly is starting to do pony galops.

5./ Run and Jump - She LOVES this! I throw on some ballet music, roll up a small rug and have her run and then LEAP over the rug. At first she just ran over the rug but after a day of practicing she started really jumping over it. She has been requesting to do this one daily.

6./ Basketball - All you need is a laundry basket and a ball. I also use a little chair on its side and have Everly stand behind it. She just throws the ball in and then I throw it back and encourage her to try catching it. It is important to set it up so that they get the majority in. Once she gets 3 or more in a row, I move the basket a bit further away. This one was great fun!

More to come!

Fine Motor Skills are Fun

2009-06-15T21:37:00.002-04:00

One night I stayed up late writing down activities from the Chasing Cheerio's blog. One was using an eyedropper to transfer coloured water into a watercolour tray.

The next day my neighbour brought me over a little pink icecube tray. I was so excited because it was exactly what I needed for this! Unfortunately I couldn't find the eyedroppers I bought months ago, so Everly had to use a medicine dispenser.

She really liked this, but needed my help since the medicine dispenser was stiff. I can't wait to find the eyedroppers so she can try this again.

Painting with water outside/ mud pies

2009-06-15T21:26:00.002-04:00

All you need is a paintbrush, some water, and a sidewalk, rock, fence etc... I took Everly outside on Saturday morning armed with a couple of paintbrushes and a cup of water. She loved this immediately. Then our neighbour came out - she is 4. The two of them had so much fun painting trees, lamp posts, and the sidewalk. Another neighbour who is 7 showed up with her paintbrush and joined in the fun. I honestly think this kept them busy for at least 1.5 hours if not 2! Later in the afternoon they went at it again.

They also had fun digging in some dirt by a tree. They made a huge muddy mess, and had a blast. I will be sad when the dirt gets covered with grass.

I love how much we are getting outside now that it is finally warm. I think we spent almost the entire day on Saturday outside.

Walks & Hikes

2009-06-12T13:24:00.002-04:00

We have started going on a walk (or two) around our neighbourhood everyday. At first I told Everly that on this walk there would be no "ups". The first time we went she asked a few times. Now when we go she walks the whole way on her own and really gets into it. She picks up leaves, grass, dandelions. We talk about the cars going by, the types of plants we see I try to go at her pace as much as possible. We have always walked a lot but never a specific route and never with the intention that these ones do.

The best part is when we get back one of her little friends is always outside digging in his garden, so Everly joins him and they have so much fun getting all muddy.

My husband and I have also been trying to take her on a "hike" each weekend. She gets really excited to do this. She gets to play by a river, try to climb trees, and be away from cars, people etc..

Scissors & drawing

2009-06-12T13:07:00.007-04:00

We were at the play centre one day and Everly saw another child using scissors. She had a go and she did GREAT! I ran out right away and bought her a pair or kids scissors. We have been cutting a few times a week and she is getting really good! She can cut paper into pieces and seems to totally understand to keep her other hand away. I have started showing her how to cut and then more the scissors to make the cut longer. I do this a couple times and say "open, cut, open, MOVE, CUT!!" She is starting to try.

Using scissors is great for fine motor development and helps them build strength in their hands, which helps with drawing and writing. We also cut foam tongue depressors, and straws.

She has become interested in drawing again. One day I drew a happy face on her paper, and now she always wants me to draw one. She loves scribbling on it and trying to add arms and legs. I help her draw her own as well because she wants to. I read on MDC that to encourage creativity you shouldn't show kids how to draw things and just let them do it on their own. I was planning to do that but now here we are. :P When she is adding arms and legs or eyes, I don't tell her if she is doing it right or not. I just let her do it her own way. To me this seems like a good balance.

The Pressure to Teach

2009-06-12T12:59:00.003-04:00

Lately I have been feeling pressure to teach Everly things like the ABC song, or rote counting etc. No one is pressuring me, but when I hear other mom's and Nanny's going on about how their 2 year olds can count to 20 or sing their ABC's for spell their names it starts to get to me.

I have finished and am currently reading another book that really encourage you not to push those types of skills at an early age. It makes sense to me. Everly is interested in exploring the world, not being drilled with rote learning. She loves to do anything physical, so I try to encourage that. Still when you have a little girl who many people say seems very bright, I do start to feel like I am failing since she doesn't know her ABCs. She does recognize numbers and does know part of the song.

With counting she actually really enjoys it! She can count to 2 and I think that is great. She can count if something is one, or if it is two. We are "working on 3", but I guess I am more interested in her actually understanding what a number represents than being able to count to some high number.

Two Years Old

2009-05-19T13:36:00.003-04:00

I can't believe my little girl is TWO!!! We had a fun party with our closest family there, and Everly had a great time. We got her a balance bike - that is too big even when DH made extra holes to lower the seat. I got her some Frog and Toad books as well - she LOVES them so much. My mom and I got her a green Tripp Trapp chair, which I am in love with and Everly is really enjoying.

She is so different now. She is talking so much. Today we got home from the park and she said "I chase boys". OMG it was the cutest thing ever. She was chasing some boys there. When we go to the park she immediately tries to make friends and wants to play. She is talking pretty well so 2-4 year olds seem more interested in her now. She can pretty much climb anything at the park - including the things intended for older kids. I just spot her and she goes nuts.

Her tantrums are now few and far between. I think her language skills have helped with that and her eye teeth have come through now (only 6 more teeth to go!). She is just so much fun to be around. It is incredible how much she understands.

I finished "The Hurried Child" I mentioned before and I love the new perspective it has given me. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I can just do what feels natural and not worry about "teaching". Since taking on this new philosophy Everly has really become interested in counting. She loves her counting books and if I don't actually count the items she will take my hand and make me help her point and count. I now have faith that she will learn to do all the things she needs when the time is right.

Long Time - job loss & car accident

2009-05-19T13:30:00.003-04:00

It has been a while...

I lost my day job. I worked for my aunt, and her husband (my mom's brother) was killed this fall in a biking accident. She decided to put her business on hold, which means I am out of a job. I wish that I didn't have to find something else, because more than anything I want to be home with Everly. I just don't think we can get by without that income. I had thought about taking on more teaching hours at my current schools, but the schedule was already set by the time I got let go. Honestly I felt like my whole world was crashing... and I guess I still do. It seems like a lot of bad things are happening right now. I am trying to stay positive.

A week after I got let go, I was waiting for someone to make a right hand turn. I looked in my rear view mirror and saw the guy behind me coming to a stop. I just chilled out for a second and BANG. I got rear ended. Some girl smashed into the guy behind me and he hit me. What a pain!! I got whiplash, which seems to be fine except my nose sometimes gets tingly. I missed a day of work because of it, and now I have to deal with all the insurance stuff. Not fun. At first I felt really bad for the girl that hit us... but now I am more angry than anything. Thank goodness Everly wasn't in the car.

Busy Busy

2009-04-30T09:34:00.002-04:00

Pookie is keeping me SO busy these days. When she is feeling good she wants me to dance with her, take her outside, or play with her. Sometimes she will get quite involved in her kitchen and do that on her own, but other than that she needs me. When she isn't happy she is either having tantrums or is increadibly whiny. I am finding it really hard to find the time to even think straight let alone blog these days.

Her tantrums are getting to me. I feel so useless when she throws a one. Sometimes it will happen when I am trying to get ready so that I can take her outside, or to the park etc. It is so frustrating to be unable to do anything. She hasn't been eating much lately, and I am wondering if being hungry is making her more on edge. Yesterday she just had yogurt, avocado, a small piece of cheese, a bit of potato and some of Daddy's frozen yogurt. Normally she would eat much more. It has been this way for a few weeks. She will often only have a few bites of her dinner. Her nursing does seem to be up a bit, but not a lot. Has anyone else dealt with this?

My parents are increadibly supportive and they love Pookie so much. However I do feel... judged (not sure if that is the right word), when Pookie loses it. It feels like they think I am to blame. Like perhaps I am too permissive or something. Bleh. For the most part I don't let it get to me, but sometimes it is hard not to.

Depsite this being a challenging time it sure is a lot of fun. Pookie is talking more and more everyday. She is constantly trying to tell us things. More and more her little personality is being revealed and I just love getting to know her.

Slowing Down

2009-04-21T14:59:00.004-04:00

So I am over half way through David Elkinds "Hurried Child" and I just love it. I love when I read a book and have new found clarity or have that enlightened feeling. I feel like I finally really get why I don't need to be drilling ABC's or pushing that kind of learning. That isn't to say we will stop singing the ABC's or counting things etc. but I feel like I now understand better why it makes sense to just slow down and let Pookie learn things in her own time. There really is no rush. I think one of the parts that really gave me clarity was when the author talked about a class of 4-5 year olds who had a teacher who really wanted to make a difference and get them reading. They did surprisingly well, but a few years later they read with no enjoyment. He went on to talk about how children who are pushed to read early often don't enjoy it the way children who read in their own time do.

Before starting this book I was planning on signing Pookie up for a creative movement class with an excellent teacher I teach with. Her class is wonderful and creative... but it is still a structured class. After reading and watching Pookie dance on her own I have started to think I should wait. I can foster her love of dancing at home, and not risk her getting put off by a structured class.

I am really looking forward to finishing this one and starting the other book I got on hurrying children - Under Pressure: Rescuing Childhood from the Culture of Hyper-Parenting- Carl Honore

Strong Emotions

2009-04-21T13:10:00.004-04:00

Lately Pookie and I seem out of sync. I think this is because I have taken on a private lesson on Wednesday mornings which means one of our mornings is gone. Also DH is working away on our upstairs which means every weekend Pookie and I have to leave the house (usually to the Zoo). I am feeling increadibly stressed, Pooks is grouchy, taxes are due, student exams are coming up and Pookie's b-day is soon. I am so looking forward to May when things calm down and Pookie and I can try to get back in sync again.

Now that Pooks is getting older, her personality seems to becoming more and more clear. She seems to be a lot more active than other kids her age. Not hyperactive at all, just full of energy. She also seems to understand how to get a reaction out of people and how to ham it up. She has an arsenal of faces she makes and sometimes she will make one and you think she really is feeling sad or grouchy, and then she will look you in the eye and start laughing. When she is happy she glows, but when she is upset... watch out! She has been having more temper tantrums lately. Ones that I can't control at all. In the past I let them run their course, but usually I sense when she is almost done and an offer or a hug or to nurse will usually snap her out of it. Now the length of time she spends upset has increased. It is so hard to watch her so upset and I always feel increadibly guilty. I also access to see if it is something I could of prevented, and even if I can't come up with a way I still feel responsible.

Yesterday I took her to the Play Centre. We got there much later than usual so Pookie still really wanted to play when it was time to go. They do a circle time and I thought she would like it. In hindsight I should of just left immediately. I took her over and she saw the train set and wanted to pull it all out. All the toys had been put away and you are not supposed to take them out. Well I told her she could have one train and I thought that would be cool. Boy was I wrong. She LOST IT! She ran and threw herself down and started sobbing... while they were all singing songs. I stayed calm and tried to get all our stuff together as fast as possible. It felt like it took FOREVER! I picked her up screaming and kicking and took her to the car. Once in the car I decided to let her calm down until she was ready to either go home or go to the store. After 40 minutes of sitting in the car she just wanted to play in there and I had to put her in her seat forcibly. I felt so aweful & defeated I just wanted to cry.

We got home and had a nap together and she was much more pleasant when she woke up.

I am hoping that teething is playing apart in this. She is still cutting her eye teeth and last night she tossed and turned, and this morning she saw a teething ring in the freezer, grabbed it and chewed on it until it was room temperature.

Vent

2009-04-17T15:32:00.002-04:00

I guess this will be a vent more than anything. Sometimes I get so frustrated when I try to explain myself and why I take the approach to parenting that I do. Over at MDC you get so much support and are surrounded by mom's that have a similar philosophy when it comes to raising a child. Sometimes I forget that some mom's are just on a different planet than me... or it feels that way anyways. I feel this need to explain myself... but when I do I just know there is no way to get my point across without sounding standoffish or better than you. I know this probably sounds silly but sometimes I feel like I have been enlightened from going to MDC and reading books that support those philosophies. It is hard to not want to enlighten other people... but then again I am sure they just think I am nutso and want me to keep my theories to myself.

Value of True Play

2009-04-16T10:53:00.003-04:00

I just found a great article on the value of true play. I really enjoyed it so I thought I would share.

http://www.naturalfamilyonline.com/5-ap/45-children-development.htm

edited

Here is great another article suggested by Becca- Artistmama from Chocolate Eyes.

http://theparentingpassageway.com/2008/10/05/fostering-creative-play/

Better Bedtime

2009-04-16T10:41:00.003-04:00

A few months ago I was gently working towards weaning Pookie from nursing to sleep. It was going well... then she got sick and we started nursing to sleep again. I thought all our "work" had gone out the window, but she started putting her head on her pillow after nursing a bit and then going to bed.

Then I started telling her to put her head on the pillow when we were done reading & nursing, and she would do it without any fuss. Then one night I had to leave the room after she put her head down. I left planning to go back but it was pretty clear she was fine. Since then I have started leaving her in the room awake. We read/ nurse, turn the lights off and I give her a kiss goodnight and leave. Most of the time she is fine and just goes to sleep.

I am SO pleased with this. It was one of my goals to have her able to fall asleep on her own before baby #2 comes into the picture. At this point that will be a year away at the very earliest, so I am very hopefully that we will reach that goal by then.

Now that said, she has been waking up again 1-1.5 hours after I put her to sleep. She had stopped but is back to doing this. Right now I think it might be partially because she is getting some new teeth. One of my other hopes is that she is mostly sleeping through the night by the time #2 comes along. I can handle one or even 2 night wakings but I would really like to be able to put her to bed and have mom/ dad time without interuptions. Who knows if it will happen? I figure it can't hurt to be optomistic, and to do everything I can to put odds in our favour of it happening.

Free Range Child

2009-04-14T14:32:00.003-04:00

My mom is so sweet. Whenever she see's an article in the paper, or hears something on the radio that she thinks I will be interested in she lets me know.

Today I arrived at her house to drop Pookie off while I work and she told me about a show she had heard on the CBC called "Hurried Infant". Apparently it was about the negative effects of trying to get children to read before they are 5. I haven't listened to it yet, but it sounded like it was pretty interesting. Here is the link. I believe you can listen to the show

http://www.cbc.ca/ideas/features/hurried-infant/index.html

It really got me thinking about how I find myself constantly stuggling to find a balance between creating chances for Pookie to learn and experience the world, and allowing her to explore her world in her own time.

It is something that I often think about. Naturally I am a teacher. I have always wanted to teach children, and now with all the reading I have been doing I am finding I need to change what is ingrained in me. Teaching children to dance at the level I teach at is not something you can do in this new modern/ natural approach. Allowing myself to be in the background in terms of the learning process is still quite foreign.

I think at the moment my thoughts on this are to offer toys and experiences which allow her to learn and explore, but to omit any pressure or praise. For example I do point out letters, and have lots of them around but we don't do drills. I try my best to follow her lead in terms of what she enjoys doing, and offer suggestions occasionally without any pressure. I heard a new term today "free-range children" - click on the link to read more.

I have ordered two books which I hope will help me solidify some of my thoughts on this.

1./ The Hurried Child - Dr. David Elkind

2./ Under Pressure: Rescuing Childhood from the Culture of Hyper-Parenting- Carl Honore

Muffin Tray Meals

2009-04-12T13:51:00.003-04:00

I had read about using a muffin tray for meals in one of Dr. Sears' books, and then a little while ago someone on MDC posted a link to pictures of muffin tray meals. As soon as I saw them I just had to get my own muffin tray.

I got her a blue silicone tray and we have used it everyday since. She really enjoys eating out of it and I really like that it forces me to give her 6 different food items. Usually she eats what we eat plus we offer her some additional things - like berries, yogurt etc.. I use it for dinner every night and most lunches. For breakfast she usually just has oatmeal so we don't bother then.

Now she will often say "dip dip dip" at meal time since there is usually yogurt, applesauce or hummus for her to dip her food into.

Fill in the blank & Signing ABCs

2009-04-09T09:47:00.003-04:00

Pooks is doing great with her words. I think she must have about 150-200 now. I lost track after 120. She is by no means to the point where she can make a sentance. She is starting to put 2 words together more and more. Like "Bye Daddy", "I don't know" and "Help me".

Since she can't sing songs with the correct words we do fill in the blanks. I will sing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little _____" and she will say "star". We have been doing this for lots of songs, the ABC's and 123's. I couldn't believe how many she would get right. Of course when I tried to get her to show my mom she didn't get any right. :P

We are also working on signing the ABC's. I think I might of mentioned this before. We are up to H now. I just do it with her once in a while when I remember, and occasionally let her watch the signing on Starfall. For some reason that is her favourite.

Neat Toddler

2009-04-03T13:57:00.003-04:00

Since Pooks was able to play with toys I have included her in the tidying up process. Sometimes I will give her a toy and she will take it to it's place. All of our toys have a special home which I think helps.

Lately she has started to clean up without me reminding her. The other day we were playing with her train set. She went and brought a bin with a Zoo set in it. She put it down and indicated that we needed to clean the train up first. She did most of it by herself, and then set to playing with the zoo.

Once I told my husband to tell her to clean up with him and he thought I was nuts. Like I was punishing her. I encouraged him to do it and see that she actually enjoys it. To his surprise I was right! To her cleaning up is just part of the game.

Now I can't say we always clean up like this. Sometimes we get distracted, or she gets upset and we leave things out and I clean them up on my own later. I am hoping if we keep this up, cleaning up will just be something we always do and won't be a big deal.

Matching Game & Letter Awareness

2009-04-03T13:27:00.004-04:00

Pooks has been obsessed with "Bof" (both) lately. So I thought it would make sense to get one of those memory card games and just use it for matching. Mastermind didn't have any!! So I ended up getting two decks of "Go Fish" animal/ letter cards for $6. She get so excited to play this. The challenge for her is to stick with it. She can match them up no problem but gets distracted. This is how she has been with most of her new games/ activities. As she gets more into it I will add more of the cards. For now 10 is enough. I love that as she gets older these cards can grow with her. There are also lower case letters with baby animals in each deck.

I got these cards because I liked that they had animals which we have been talking a lot about since we have been to the Zoo 6 times in 5 weeks! Also she is very aware of letters now. She is always pointing them out excitedly when we are out.

Mixed Feelings

2009-04-03T13:20:00.004-04:00

As the time to possibly start TTC gets closer I find I am less enthusiastic than I thought. Last night I climbed into bed with Pookie and we were snuggling each other and I just felt so much love for her. I was thinking how much I am enjoying being a mom to her and how nice our life is now. Not that is wasn't nice when she was a little baby, but it is much more relaxed and free now.

I keep thinking how another baby will disrupt this and I just can't imagine giving up any of "our" time. At the same time I really do want a second child and I really want to be able to give her a little brother or sister.

I never thought I would feel this way. I know it is normal... but I didn't think it would happen to me.

Dissapointed - co-sleeping meet up

2009-03-31T13:01:00.003-04:00

Yesterday I attending a co-sleeping "meet-up". I was really excited about it, and was hopefully there would be at least one mom there who was onto baby #2. I was also hopeful that it would be facilitated and not just a free for all. It ended up being all new mom's, mostly with little babies and a total free-for-all. I didn't contribute one thing to the group. For the most part I could even hear because the facilitators daughter was throwing this hard plastic ball the entire time.

Let me address the ball throwing first. Pooks was having a great time playing with the facilitators 3 year old daughter. The got a hold of this hard ball and the 3 year old started throwing it down really hard. I didn't want Pookie to do that because I was concerned it would land on one of the little babies, also it was extremely noisy. I took her aside, kneeled down and explained that yes she could play with the toys, but that she could not throw them because it could hurt the babies. She did a little demo of not throwing the toy and pointed to the babies. She ran off and did not throw the toys once. I just couldn't understand why the 3 year olds mom couldn't do the same. She even had chances to get rid of the toy, but just handed it back. It was weird because she seemed uncomfortable with the ball throwing. My only thought was that she knew if she intervened at all her daughter would have a tantrum. I don't know to me it looked like unparenting, rather than gentle discipline. I feel like this is exactly what a lot of people mistake GD for and why people think it doesn't work.

The big disappointment was that it was totally unfacilitated. Other that intros the rest was a free-for-all. I am not good in big groups like that so I didn't say one thing. I felt like I had a lot to offer since I was one of only 2 mom's with 2 year olds - most were under 1. There were lots of topics that we never got to since it wasn't led. There was also a big talk on getting your baby to take a bottle, which was frustrating since it was totally off topic. I felt like some bad advice was being given and one of the other mom's tried to intervene with more solid advice but she wasn't really let in to the convo. Anyways I left feeling pretty horrible because I had paid 10 bucks to just sit there and not even hear or contribute anything. At least Pooks had a good time.

I figured the other mom's would be pretty earthy, but I only felt like a few were, and I felt like those mom's were pretty quite. I am sure I saw one of the mom's hit her babies hand as well. I was so excited that these mom's would be very much like the MDC crowd, and would have thoughts and idea's that were new to me.

I guess I should be thankful that I do have a couple of friends who are into natural living. Perhaps I should give up on going to these groups. There will be one next week on elimination communication. Hopefully it will be better.

Goals & Pooks' hair

2009-03-26T21:48:00.004-04:00

I just had to share this pic of Pookie's hair. Will it ever be long enough for pigtails?

I usually have some sort of goal I am working on with Pooks. It started pretty much right after she was born and I was home alone all day and needed something to do. So first I worked with her to give her opportunities to try reaching for objects and holding on to them. Then we worked on her neck strength. It wasn't like I was on a mission or anything, I just felt like I should give her lots of chances to practice doing the things that would make her stronger and better able to explore her environment.

Some of my current "goals" for Pooks - I am mostly writing it out to remind me :P

Help her learn to sign the alphabet and to gain an awareness of the alphabet & words. By no means do I sit down and drill her but I try to point out letters throughout the day, and we practice signing the letters together which she likes. So far she can get up to F. She also has started pointing out "E" when we see signs while driving.
I always try to challenge her physically. I guess that is the dance teacher in me. She can balance on one leg with the other high in the air. It is so cute to see. Right now we are doing a lot of bunny hops. They are hard for her but she likes trying. We are also getting her a balance bike so that should be fun for her.
Colours. She is slowly starting to get it. I just need to keep on myself to label objects along with their colour.
Asking nicely. I have been explaining to her that she can ask nice and it make me happy to do things for her. Sometimes she will just start whining and fussing when she wants something. It seems in times of desperation she forgets about using words. I very gently say to her "what would you like? Can you ask nicely?" Almost immediately her face lightens and she will let me know what she would like and say please. It always seems like she is thinking "oh yeah, I just have to ask!".

Unschooling Inspiration

2009-03-26T21:29:00.004-04:00

I really enjoy reading about unschooling. It seems to make so much sense to me. For anyone that doesn't know about it basically it is a way of homeschooling children in which you let the child lead the way and learn in their own time. If they have an interest you can help them explore it, but there are no traditional "lessons" - unless the child chooses it. If I were to homeschool I would definitely be very influenced by unschooling, however like most things I would probably find my own way and use some more traditional methods.

Anyways... now that Pooks is getting older and is really learning things, I am doing my best to pick up on what she is interested in and read up on what she could possibly learn. Currently she is obsessed with "both" or "bof" as she says. She is always pointing out when two things match. The other day our two cats were sitting together and she said "bof" or we were playing cars and she grabbed the two red ones and said "bof". Since this concept is so interesting to her right now I am going to go out and get a memory/ matching game and see if she likes finding "bofs". :P

I found an awesome link "Curriculum Standards for Preschoolers". Obviously Pooks isn't a preschooler yet but I found the majority of things on that list were things I could incorporate into our everyday lives. For example things like "big/ little" or "over/ under". She already mostly understands those but after reading that link it inspired me to point those kinds of things out to her. I wrote out all the ones I thought were within her grasp now or in the near future and stuck them on my fridge to remind me to incorporate them into our play.

Montessori Type Activity

2009-03-25T21:57:00.003-04:00

I really love getting ideas from Montessori, however right now neither Pookie nor myself are interested in doing things quite as specifically as true montessori activities are. We just get inspiration from the activities, practical life etc and make them our own.

I got Pooks these really ceramic dishes from Ikea for her kitchen. One of the things it comes with is a tiny pouring jug which immediately made me think of Montessori. So one night when I was attempting unsuccessfully to cook dinner, I came up with this activity. I showed her how to do it and she really enjoyed it. Basically she put the jug in the blue bowl and used it to fill all the cups, and once she did that she poured the water back into the blue bowl. We will definitely have to do this one again!

More Creativity

2009-03-25T21:50:00.003-04:00

I found this little ceramic (?) easter shapes at the dollar store that came with some paints. I figured for a dollar why not. She really enjoyed doing this, although I realized I didn't fully think out my purchase when I smelt the paints! They were a bit on the toxic side. Oh well I lived on the edge and let her paint. I watched her carefully so she didn't get any on her or decide to give it a taste. She was really amazed when we went back to her egg and it was all dry and shiny. Once again I had to stop myself from micro-managing the whole process. It was hard to watch her mix all the paint colours into an ugly brown hue, however she didn't mind and seemed to really like her end product. The great thing about all this painting we are doing is she seems to be gaining more and more awareness of her colours. More and more she is pointing to the correct colour when I ask. Although all colours for the most part are "booo" - blue.

We also made some whole wheat playdough. We had no white flour, but it worked fine. We used neon food dye and with the whole wheat flour I really like the end result. I decided to make her three different colours and not worry if she mixed them up. So far they have actually stayed separate. Her favourite thing to do is have me make a bowl and then we make berries and fill up the bowl.

Egg Carton Caterpillars

2009-03-25T21:44:00.003-04:00

My mom used to do this craft with us when we were kids and I always loved it, even when I was much older. It is SO easy and Pookie just LOVED it. All you do is cut an egg carton in half to get two caterpillars. Put a couple holes in the "head" for antena and the rest is up to you. I put the antenna on and helped Pookie glue on eyes, then drew a happy mouth. After that she really saw what we were doing and I let her go to town attempting to glue pieces of cut up foam sticks & some feathers. She worked on it for a long time and did surprisingly well with the glue. I did my best not to interfere. I want her to be creative and not do something the way I think it should be done. For example after explaining to her that you should leave the foam pieces on so they can dry, she decided she would still like to pull them off and put them back on again. I held back and just let her do what she wanted. Also I gently explained you just needed a little bit of glue but sometimes she really wanted a lot... again I decided I should just bite my tongue and let her experiment.

We still have the caterpillars and she is enjoying playing with them. I think next time we will paint first and then glue the next day.

Surviving a Public Meltdown

2009-03-20T12:40:00.003-04:00

Today Pookie and I went to the library and then to the mall. We went into Mastermind, which always has lots of toys out for the kids to play with. Pooks played for ages on the Thomas table and then with this wooden barn. Then she says "baby" and races over to the babies. She spotted some Corolle doll not in a box she had never seen before. She grabbed it and cuddled it and started high-tailing it out of the store. I raced after her and stopped her. I got down on her level and explained the doll had to go back. Then she started hugging it really tight saying "please please", in a desperate voice. I might of got it for her but it was $20, and just not worth it. After explaining to her that the doll had to go back with it's friends, she really lost it. I moved quickly, picked her up, put the doll back and got out of the store.

I could hardly hold her because she was going all limp. She was SOBBING so loud, and it seemed like everyone was looking. I looked for a spot to put her down and talk to her. She wouldn't stand and ended up lying down flat on her back in tears. I tried reasoning with her, offered to take her to the pet store, but it was clear she just needed to cry. Again I carried her, this time over to a soft bench. I put her down and let her cry for a while. OMG I swear EVERYONE was staring at us. That was the only stressful thing about the whole situation. I gave up sooner than I probably "should" of and took her down to the pet store. There she slowly came out of "it", but she was still a toddler on the edge. :P Finally she was calm enough that I could get her organized to go home.

There is something really empowering about getting through a public tantrum without losing your cool. So many times I see people yelling at their kids making the situation worse. I am always sympathetic because it is so hard to deal with, at the same time I take notes on what NOT to do. Next time if it happens I will take her to a place that is a bit more private so I can let her work it out.

Language Explosion has Begun

2009-03-16T11:51:00.003-04:00

It seems that the "language explosion" has begun for Pookie. There have been times that I have been vaguely worried that she didn't use as many words as her peers. Mostly I knew it was unfounded and that her comprehension was wonderful and that with her signs, and sounds she could communicate very well. Still I have been hopeful she would start talking soon, and now I got my wish!

It is amazing how each day she says a few new words, & uses more words to communicate. She is also using a few phrases like "all done" and "I don't know". Last night we were looking at a book and I was pointed to the pictures asking her what they were. There were two pictures of berries, and she pointed to one picture then the other and said "both". This just blew my mind... I know it really isn't that amazing, but to hear her use a word like "both" correctly was pretty cool.

I am working on an excel sheet so I can list all the words she knows, and when she acquires them. So far I am up to 100. I think by the time she is 2 she will be talking quite well. My baby is growing up!!

EC Grad

2009-03-16T11:42:00.002-04:00

I think I can say with 100% certainty that Pookie is now an EC Grad. In the last 2 weeks she has started waking up in the middle of the night to tell me she has to go pee, and during the day she has been 100% reliable, and lets me know when she has to go. My hope was that she would be a grad by the time she turned 2, so we are 2 months ahead of schedule!

I remember when I first started reading about EC it seemed so over the top, and foreign to me. By no means was I against it but it just seemed extremist. Now it seems like the most natural thing you could do.

Last week my sister sent me a link to an article on ECing,
http://www.parentcentral.ca/parent/article/599942
and it just BLEW MY MIND that people got so angry and were so negative about it in their comments. I think a lot of people totally miss the point, and think that you are trying to "train" a newborn, and really it isn't about that at all. Some people say "it is the parents that are trained"... I know some EC parents get offended by this but I do think there is truth to that... and SO WHAT?

So what if I have trained myself to listen to my babies needs, and make sure she isn't sitting in a dirty diaper? Is that really so bad? After my husband - who really just goes along with my ideas, read the article and comments he said "but who puts an age limit on getting past crapping yourself? Seriously!?! " . So true! What is so bad about a child learning to use the potty sooner than later?

Play Space

2009-03-07T20:16:00.004-05:00

I always love it when I get to see other families' play spaces, so I thought I would share one of ours. We have one finished room in the basement. 1/3 of it is for our couch and TV and everything behind it is for Pookie. We got the storage system from ikea. It works really well for toys with lots of parts & for stuffed animals.

I got the foam letters and numbers were given to us from my husbands cousin. Since our walls are in such rough shape down there (notice the pealing wallpaper - not picked by us), I didn't hesitate to put them up.

I got the open shelf on craigslist for $20, it is $100 at ikea. I just put that down there last week and Pookie has been enjoying having her puzzles on it.

Not seen in the shot is a closet. Once we do a bit more decluttering, my husband is going to dry wall it, paint it and turn it into a secret hideaway for Pookie. My cousins had one under their stairs and I was always loved playing in there so much.

We also have some toys upstairs in our living room/ dining room - her kitchen and some other odds and ends are up there.

Imaginative Play

2009-03-02T08:12:00.004-05:00

Pookie's play these day's consist almost entirely of imaginative play. She has two Corolle dolls and will take the two of them, make voices for them (no words though), make them dance around, push each other in the stroller. She will even put puzzle pieces in their tiny hands and try to get them to do her puzzles. When she plays with me or DH she always wants to play dolls, with her farm set or train set. It is pretty amazing to watch, especially when she gets really involved all by herself.

I am trying my best to foster this and encourage her imagination as much as I can. We have started to play "cats". We walk around on all fours, meowing, cleaning our selves and rubbing heads. She really enjoys this game.

Another one that seemed to click this morning is play "baby" where she pretends to be a little baby. It was pretty cute she crawled into my arms and I rocked her like a baby and she did her impersonation of a little baby crying - which actually sounds like a screech.

I always thought the baby phase would be my favourite but I am enjoying her toddlerhood much more! It is so amazing watching her grow and learn everyday.

Why I choose wooden toys

2009-02-26T16:44:00.005-05:00

Sometimes I drive along thinking about topics for my blog and I got to thinking about wooden toys and why I choose them. First of all I have to admit that if the majority of MDC mothers do it, I usually follow suit. That is what got me into wood toys, from there I did my research. Here are some reason's, off the top of my head.

1./ They are more the most part more aesthetically pleasing to look at. I will happily set up Everly's wood toys in our living room, but a pile of plastic is just an eyesore to me.

2./ They hold up better. When a wood toy gets used and abused it just looks antiqued... when a plastic toy gets old it looks worn out and grubby.

3./ Plastics have "plasticizer's" in them which aren't good. Things like BPA and phthalates... yucky. Not good for kids.

4./ The act of making a plastic toy creates a lot of pollution. IMO it is worse than using a renewable resource like a tree.

5./ They tend to be simpler in design, which can mean more use of the imagination and less "do-dads" to distract the child.

6./ You really can't find many "junky" wooden toys... on the other hand there are so many plastic toys that are just junk. Stuff that is a novelty for a while and will later end up in a landfill. When you buy a wood toy you think out your purchase since they aren't cheap.

Strong Will

2009-02-25T12:14:00.006-05:00

It seems like just when I get used to a stage, and have figured out how to avoid any meltdowns, we move into a new stage. Pookie seems to be moving into a phase where she really wants to do what she wants to do... now! Her fuse is short these days (for her anyways). In past months I have had a handful of tricks to make getting dressed, leaving the house/ play centre etc. go relatively smoothly, but now those "tricks" aren't working anymore.

I have read quite a bit on consensual living and subscribe to a CL yahoo group. I am definitely inspired by some of the ideas behind it, but do not aspire to be fully consensual. As much as possible I try to allow Pookie to do what she wants to do, as long as she is not going to get hurt or hurt others. When it is practical I try to do things in the way she would like them done, but sometimes I need her to do what I want. For example not put her smelly damp bathing suit on. Before I really prided myself in being able to say something to make the situation OK with Pookie, or find an acceptable alternative. These days, if she doesn't get her way it leads to a temper tantrum. Which always leaves me feeling like I am not being a good parent. Rationally I know that isn't true, but I still feel that way.

I think we definitely need to shift how we interact with Pookie now and let her feel in control as much as we can. I am hoping I figure out this phase relatively quickly!! I am feeling pretty happy with our decision to wait on baby #2.

Getting more structured

2009-02-25T11:59:00.002-05:00

I have never been one to impose schedules on Pookie. It took a full year before we really started to set up routines for bedtime, and morning routines. For a while now our Mon, Wed, Fri (tue/ thurs I work) mornings involve an outing - to the pool, indoor playground or a free play centre. This has worked out really well! Our afternoons have been totally unstructured, so I have decided to make sure we do a few structured activities each afternoon. She has been enjoying doing these things. They seem to put her in a good mood and she is happier doing her own imaginative, creative play. I also feel good at the end of the day.

1./ Arts & Crafts - it can be simple pen drawings or more elaborate projects

2./ Circle Time - we started doing this last week and she loves it. We lay down a rug first (she loves getting it out and putting it down), and then we sing some songs like "I'm a little teapot" "Grand old duke of york" etc... we also hop around like bunnies, stretch like cats, jump like frogs etc... She gets so excited we have been only able to do part of each song, so the whole thing takes about 5 minutes. :P

3./ Montessori inspired activity - like playing with beans, puzzles etc. Lately she hasn't been into this kind of thing, and has been opting for dramatic play with her dolls, kitchen etc. I just offer it and if she isn't interested that's fine.

4./ Dancing - we throw on some tunes and dance, or just run around and jump off stuff.

5./ Playdough

I am not really into baking. I like doing it, just not eating it. I find if I bake muffins etc. we just eat them all so fast and opt for them instead of healthier options. My mom on the other hand likes to bake and has been doing it with Pooks. I am glad she gets to do this activity. Maybe when she gets a bit older I will be more motivated.

Another Plastic Purge

2009-02-18T14:13:00.003-05:00

My current interest is reading up on Waldorf Education. I am off to the library to get "You are your child's first teacher". Seeing all the pictures of the waldorf-esque playrooms out there, I became inspired to purge more of our plastic toys. They are mostly gifts so I have felt bad with giving them away. Pookie does have a few that are well used and loved. For example she just adored her Little People Farm set, so we will keep that, but much of the other junk is doing. I am just hoping my husband doesn't intervene. He has a hard time parting with things... especially gifts.

I really want to clear out the basement more so that we can convert the space under the stairs into a little hideaway for Pookie. I was hoping it would be done for her second birthday. However first my lovely husband has to deal with his piles of junk (he gets so mad when I refer to it as that).

Now Pookie is on the mend I am looking forward to once again getting back to our routine we had been building. I want to create a set time we do arts & crafts on Mon, Wed & Fri, and another set time for additional reading. I can't wait for the weather to get nice and to be able to happily go outside everyday. I just can't get myself to do it in the winter... espcially on nasty cold, muddy, snowy days like today.

Fun at the Mall

2009-02-15T15:52:00.004-05:00

Today we went to the mall to avoid going stir crazy. It seemed low-key enough for Pookie. We got her a new skirt from the Gap. I would be happy buying all her clothes from there. I love how everything coordinates and holds up so well. They always have great sales too. Anyways Pookie really only wants to wear tights for some reason, and will agree to wear a shirt. So when I saw the cutest skirt at the Gap I couldn't resist. She loved it so much we had to put it on right after we bought it. She was so funny in the Gap. She ran around and wanted everything. It is funny how into clothes & shoes she is. She has very particular ideas about what she wants to wear, and how she wants to wear stuff. I love putting her in cute comfy outfits but I am really not that into fashion, so it definitely isn't from seeing me getting all dolled up.

We were sitting on a bench having a drink and she starts saying "beeee beeee". I wasn't sure what she was getting at so I asked her "where is the B". She looked up at a "Bikini Bay" sign and pointed excitedly "beeee beee". It was really weird!! We have been doing www.starfall.com with her everyday, but we mostly do the letter E. I try to point letters out to her all the time but "B" really hasn't been one I have been focusing on. She is definitely starting to really notice letters, and even when she draws she will scribble and say "Eeeeee".

Yogurt Painting

2009-02-15T12:10:00.003-05:00

This morning we let Daddy sleep in so I decided to give yogurt painting a try. I just put it on tin foil and added some food colouring. It was a HUGE hit! Pooks didn't really like getting her hands dirty so we switched to a paint brush and baster. I showed her how you could use your finger to write in it. We did lots of letter E's since she loves "EEEEE". I think she stuck with it for about 20 minutes and then she was done. We will definitely do it again.

Playful Parenting

2009-02-14T16:01:00.005-05:00

Last summer I read Playful Parenting. It is a highly recommended book over at MDC. Pookie was only just over a year so although I found the book wonderful it wasn't very useful. Now that she is almost 2 I am finding this approach really helpful. I actually think I need to re-read it. One of the "playful" things I do with Pookie is use her baby to make certain things more fun. For example at night after she uses her potty she is often reluctant to get in bed. If I take one of her babies and do a silly voice and say "mommy I am going to go put my head on the pillow" and then walk the baby over... well Pookie just LOVES this and gets all excited about getting in bed. Overall I try to connect with Pooks on a daily basis by just having fun with her and doing really silly things. I think that has really strengthened our bond. My husband also naturally parents this way.

One of the authors ideas is to set aside a special time called "PlayTime", where you happily follow your child's lead. I try to do this all the time but sometimes I do like to make suggestions. I like the idea of setting aside this time and being really diligent about letting Pookie lead the fun... even if it might not seem so fun for me. :P

One of our fun games... that is totally silly but Pookie loves is when I throw pillows at her. I know it probably sounds horrible, but she loves having a big pillow come flying across the room and land on her. The author also believes in roughhousing. It is funny because usually it is the Dad that takes on this role but so far I am much more adventurous on this front. Pooks loves it when we do crazy physical things. I think she likes seeing all the different ways her body can move, or be moved. I also think doing this type of thing will make her more confident to try new physical things, and also stronger to do those new things.

Trying to understand timeouts for 1 year olds

2009-02-14T15:42:00.004-05:00

I try very hard not to judge other people, but I find it extremely hard to do since developing such strong views on how I parent Pookie. The concept of not using rewards punishment, & praise was new to me, but it really made sense. From year of teaching ballet I came to my own conclusions that my goal was to get the kids to WANT to work hard all on their own, and to WANT to follow the rules because they made sense and it was in their best interest. When I first started I leaned towards a lot of praise, and some punishment. Since moving away from this model, my students have become harder working, better behaved and better dancers IMO. Although it is very hard to use this method on older students who have never been taught how to push themselves. I am having that problem now. I find some of my older students need me to yell at them (they have actually requested it!), or set up competitions constantly to get them to do their best.

Anyways I was lying in bed last night trying to understand why a one year old needs timeout? (I don't plan to every use timeouts, but I find the use of them on 1 year olds more perplexing then on an older child)? I post on a very mainstream May 2007 board. It seems like most of the mom's use timeouts, and I can't even think of what might warrant one. Is it just that Pookie is really well behaved or is it just that what others might see as a problem that needs to be disciplined I see as a chance to redirect or educate. Last night Pookie was standing on her booster chair, after asking her to sit with no results, I explained to her that she might fall down and hurt herself. After she did a bit of a demonstration of falling and hurting herself she chose to sit there on her own. I think Alfie Kohn really articulated it well when he said something along the lines of that you need to think of your long term goals as a parenting. Using timeouts, bribes etc. certainly might get results, but in the long term it doesn't necessarily lead to the kind of child I want Everly to be.

My Little Ballerina

2009-02-14T15:32:00.005-05:00

Pookie continues to enjoy anything ballet related. She gets very upset if she knows I am going to teach and she isn't coming. I have tried to get her to sit on a mat while I teach, instead of in the sling, because at 24 pounds she is getting heavy for just one shoulder. She will sit on the mat for a while and then every so often she starts doing her stretches, or she will go over to the piano bench and use it as a barre to do her leg lifts and plies. It is so cute and I have a hard time not watching her.

This morning we put on a ballet outfit - as pictured above. She now has very specific ideas about what she wants to wear. She felt really great in this outfit and was all excited that I was going to take some pictures.

Although I am excited to enroll her in a ballet class, I have mixed feelings about her really getting into it. I had such a hard time with the body image aspects, as well as never feeling like I was good enough... even when I was. Because I did so much dancing I never got to do other activities and never was able to participate in sports or other things. I want Pooks to be able to try lots of different things, before she settles on one or two activities to focus on.

I have had many students who do so many activities sometimes 2 or 3/ night. Their parents push them to excel in everything and yet they can never get very good at ballet because their schedules don't allow for adequate practice. They often seem tired and distracted, or some of them are hyper active. I think it is really important to find a balance that works for your child. One of the reason's I like the idea of homeschooling is because kids have the time and focus to do other things without being worn out from hours of school. I have several homeschooled kids and they really are different (in a good way) from the other kids.

Pookie is sick

2009-02-13T14:49:00.002-05:00

Since Christmas Pookie has had a cough. It has come and gone, so I didn't think much of it. Last weekend she got really congested and was obviously sick. I took her to the doctor on Monday and have been back 2 more times this week. Basically she had a cold, it turned into a lung infection and now she has all the symptoms of asthma. The doctor assured me she doesn't actually have asthma. She doesn't seem that much better, but I am hopeful that over the weekend she improves and we don't have to go back. Apparently a few years ago they would of hospitalized her for a week or two but now they get the parents to do the treatments at home. That kind of scared me. She has to do breathing treatments... which I really don't like. I just feel really upset about the whole thing. Apparently breastfeeding doesn't make you immune to everything.

Learning Colours

2009-02-09T11:49:00.004-05:00

I am trying my best to work colours into our every day life, so Pookie will learn them. She just isn't that interested to be honest. Although today I pointed out her undies were blue and she said "bluuu" quite a few times. Later when we were drawing she picked up the blue crayon and said "Undeeeee". It was quite exciting because it was the first time she seemed to really make that kind of observation on her own. When she said it I agreed that the crayon was blue and quickly grabbed all the blue things I could for her to look at.

Then I had this great idea. I just bought her some wooden letters for the fridge. They come in four colours, so i coloured 4 pieces of paper each in one of the colours and I showed her how to put all the reds on the red paper etc. She did this at the play centre a couple months ago but putting coloured bears in their corresponding bowl. Today she was NOT into it. Oh well... maybe another day!

Drawing at 21 months & EC update

2009-02-09T11:36:00.004-05:00

Pookie is 21 months today. This morning we did some drawing. Of course she insisted on using a pen. I think she likes the tiny lines she can make with it. I am just so impressed with how she holds the pen. I can remember being taught the correct way to hold a pencil. I let her do whatever she wanted and then I stole an idea from a Kumon book I was flipping threw at the bookstore yesterday. I drew two dots and showed her how to draw a line from one dot to the other. She had a hard time understanding you stop at the second dot but she loved doing this nonetheless. Then I drew some circles and asked her if she could draw a circle. I think she does a pretty good job!

I also drew some pictures of underwear for her to colour in (or over :P ). Her new favourite word is "UNDEE". She is quite aware that she gets to wear underwear instead of a diaper and she really loves picking them out. On the EC front... I don't even think about putting her in a diaper during the day anymore. Now I am starting to wonder when I will consider her potty trained.

Stressing

2009-02-08T19:38:00.006-05:00

The older Pookie gets the more I research all the things I should be doing with her. The biggest thing I have come away with is that if I offer a stimulating environment and let her explore and play I don't need to worry. But I still do! I am trying to do more things with her and to join in when she is playing if she wants me too - which she usually does. I got out a bag of chick peas and set up with activity for her. She loves it and will ask for "beeee".

Should I be doing more arts & crafts with her? This is my newest stressor. She loves doing A/C at the play centre so now I feel guilty I don't have adequate supplies at home. That is my project for this week. Get her some things to work with - some glue, pictures to stick, stickers etc.. We have been doing lots of drawing. She prefers pen, and holds the pen correctly. She even leans in and makes tiny scribbles. Sometimes she will point to a squiggle and say "E". The first time this happened she actually pointed to something she had drawn which looked exactly like an E. Oh course I freaked out and thought she was a genius, but her other attempts to make an E bare no resemblance.

Well she is calling me! Apparently bath-time is over.

Child Friendly Home

2009-02-04T12:23:00.005-05:00

I have really been aiming to have a home that has area's for Pookie to play in all over. Our dining room is a bit of an awkward space. Too big for just a table, but too small for much else. We decided that one end would be perfect for Pooks table and kitchen. That has worked out really well. Now that she is getting older I want to set up a nook for art supplies. I grabbed some old shelves from upstairs and brought them down. It isn't exactly what I had in mind, but it will do. I love that I can put our boom box on top. It is leading to lots more dancing!

In the picture it looks like there is quite a bit of space between the end of the table and where the kitchen is but it is only a foot or so. I'd love to do something to define the kitchen a bit more but I am at a loss. Creativity is not one of my strengths. I just freeze up and think all my ideas are garbage.

We really need to get some pictures up on the wall. I was thinking about doing a collage of different sized and style frames (not too small though), with family pictures in them. We have been in this house for almost 1.5years and I just can't commit!

I am just completely in love with a house I found on MDC... and now this woman's blog is one of my fav's. I love finding new blogs that are updated frequently and are interesting and inspiring.

Early Years Centre

2009-02-04T11:48:00.005-05:00

We are really fortunate that the Ontario government funds "Early Years Centres". These are free play centres for children 0-6. There are some programs you can register for, and times where you can just go in and use their wonderful toys. All the toys have a purpose - no junky gadgets. Pookies favourite activity is arts & crafts. Today they had paints out which she loved. She also really loved pouring glue on her hand. I got some weird looks from some of the other parents, but she was just exploring and it wasn't hurting anyone.

Today a little girl (3) played with her for a bit, which she really enjoyed. That is also why I like going to the EYC - it gives Pooks a chance to play with other children.

Usually the other mom's, grandparents etc. are either quite nice or just fade into the background but there are now two mom's who really get on my nerves.

Mom #1 is the screamer. She is always yelling at her kid, who from what I can see is never doing anything wrong. Her daughter is perfectly well behaved, but the littlest thing sets this mom off. I feel bad that the poor kid can never do anything right. It is always awkward because she is so loud and overall people tend to use quite voices in this place.

Mom #2 was there today and she an over controller. Anything her kids (4 & 6) chose to do she had to tell them how to do it, or what to do. I never once saw the kids initiate any play. Her daughter sat down and just stared at the arts & crafts table, and then the mom basically micro-managed her art work. Even with the play dough she was constantly instructing them how exactly they needed to play with it. It made me feel incredibly uncomfortable to watch. Her kids acted like robots and she was proud.

Phase 2 of sleepweaning

2009-02-03T22:17:00.004-05:00

Pooks is so good at going to bed now without nursing I am moving to phase 2. Now the plan is I tuck her into the twin bed that is against our queen, sing her 2 songs and leave. I have done it a couple times now, and if she sits up and asks where I am going I just tell her, "mommy is going pee pee". Which usually is true - I just don't mention coming back or not coming back. Last night she called for me and I just called in and said I was doing pee pee, and she must of gone back asleep. I just forsee it being really useful to be able to leave her to fall asleep on her own, once another baby comes into the picture.

Now if I could just have some progress with night-weaning. Right now I nurse her and try to get her to go back into the little bed for her first two wakenings. After that she comes in the queen with me and hubby goes into the little bed. Last night she actually rolled back in those first two times on her own - although she didn't sleep well until she got into the big bed. I am hoping the fact that she rolled back in on her own is progress. I think it will be beneficial to have her sleep in her own bed - even if it is against our.

Making Friends + no TV morning

2009-02-02T13:36:00.005-05:00

Pooks just LOVES big girls. Anyone who is about 3 or older. Today we went to the indoor play centre and towards the end of our visit some older girls showed up. She got so excited and pointed to them and proceeded to start following them. One of them who was 3 or 4, quickly took Pooks under her wing. This little girl was so sweet and quiet. She led Pooks through the jungle gym, went down the slide with her, ran around holding hands with her. It was the sweetest thing ever, and Pooks was so happy. She was BEAMING!! Then two other little girls wanted to play with the girl P was playing with. The little girl told them that P had to play with them too. Then P started playing with THREE little girls. I almost got choked up because even though she was a "baby" to them I could see what a big girl she is becoming. They all played so nice and when we left there were lots of hugs and kisses.

It was actually very striking today the differences between the boys and girls.... it made me really scared to have a boy!! They are so energetic, and pushy and crazy. I usually figure this is mostly because people often parent boys differently.... but when EVERY boy is that way it certainly seems part of it is just that boys are different?!

This morning I fought the urge to go watch TV when I got up. I was really tired and just wanted to vege, but I resisted and actually enjoyed our morning much more. I think after a couple of weeks I should be out of the TV habit.

No TV this week

2009-02-01T22:18:00.003-05:00

Pookster really only watches kids TV with my husband. I will occasionally show her something on youtube - like some ballet, or horses etc. I do however wake up, grab my breakfast and vege in front of the TV. Pookie really doesn't pay that much attention to the TV, but she doesn't fully ignore it. I also started watching Little House on the Prairie (I admit it I love that show), with Pookie while Jeff makes dinner.

I want to stop . It isn't that I think TV is evil or anything but I do want to avoid it for as long as possible when it comes to Pooks. So I am blogging about this to keep me accountable. I am going to aim to go this entire week without letting Pooks see any TV at all, and hopefully I can rework my morning routine.

We will see how it goes!

Alien/ Robot Dance Party

2009-02-01T22:06:00.004-05:00

Today we went to this family dance party which took place at a fancy downtown nightclub. I didn't really have any expectations, other than that I thought it would be in a one room club and be good but not super fun. It was so much fun and so well put together. The club was huge with multiple levels, and different rooms. There was a big room for dancing where they had people dressed as robots and aliens, and they would have dance offs. There was a smaller room with more dancing, and beach balls to play with and glow in the dark drawing to do. Downstairs they had cardboard castles (big!) to draw on and a book nook. It had a Yo Gabba Gabba theme - a show my husband loves to watch with Pookie on the computer.

We went with our couple friend, who have two children - we went to the Zoo and pool with them last week. It was funny being at a club with them because they often went to the same club Jeff and I used to go to. Who knew all those years ago... a decade ago... that we would be hanging out at a club with our kids.

Pookie had a lot of fun. She just loves our friend's older daughter who is a year older. She can even say her name already - which is HUGE for Pooks. Now if you mention her buddies name her face lights up... SO CUTE!!

There were a lot of slings, and carriers and breastfeeding mom's which was nice to see. Actually there were a lot of Dad's wearing carriers. Jeff has always enjoyed wearing Pooks but we have only seen one of two other Dad's using a carrier since Pooks was born.

I had fun talking to T. She is also an AP mom, and the first I know with a child older than mine, so it is nice to listen to her experiences. She also makes being a mom of 2 look easy... which I think puts Jeff at ease!

No more nursing to sleep... well almost

2009-02-01T11:48:00.004-05:00

Today my husband calls me into the bedroom to show me what Pookie is doing. She is sitting with her newest Corolle baby doll, with her arm around it her shirt up (well as up as she could get it, and was reading a book. This is exactly what we do everynight before bed. She even had her arm around the doll in the same way. She loves nursing her babies, and also likes me to do it. She even makes her little plastic animals nurse from each other. The pig is a big favourite because it clearly a mommy pig with all its teets. :P

Anyways it has been almost a month and Pooks no longer wants to nurse to sleep at bedtime. I nurse her for about 30 minutes+ while we read books then when I reach to turn off the lights I unlatch her and we are done. She snuggles into bed and acts like she will just go to sleep... but usually it takes another 10 minutes. First I sing to her and then I just lay there with her until she dozes off. It has made bedtime SO much less stressful. It was just too hard lying there for so long nursing her and fighting to stay awake.

We have made no progress with nightweaning. I attempted to get her to sleep in the twin bed, which she does fine until the second time she wakes up at night. Then it is miserable. I think we will start her out in there and only try to keep her there on the weekends, and let her slowly get used to it. She doesn't outright object but the past two nights she has been so restless.

More good news is that she seems to be staying asleep until Jeff and I go to bed. This is AMAZING! It is so nice not having to run up to her half way through a TV show. :)

I bought the "No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers" and I am finding it helpful. Most of the tips I already was aware of but it is motivating to read and I feel like now I can come up with a realistic plan.

Being more Green

2009-01-30T12:41:00.004-05:00

So we are on our second bottle of sodium laureth sulphate free shampoo. I am not sure if it is just that the second bottle isn't working well but my hair is NASTY!! Here I was thinking I might try no-poo (using baking soda and vinegar), but now I am too scared.

So I thought I would try Lush's shampoo bars, because there is no packaging. I got them home and was all excited until I read the ingredients and saw they have SLS in them!! UGH! I just can't win. I don't like to be wasteful so I will use them up, and hopefully next time around I can find one that is both SLS-free and comes in a bar.

FYI why SLS is bad (without getting into details - you can do a search):

1: Can penetrate eyes and tissues and can stay in the tissues... especially children and babies

2: Strips moisture & oils away = damaged hair and skin

3: Can apparently cause damage to DNA in cells according to Japanese studies

4: Forms Nitrates - carcinogen

5: Produces Nitrosamines - carcinogen

I have also started using the popular Dr. Bronner's soap. I am loving it! It smells so nice and seems to do a great job. People use it for everything. I am thinking we will need to go on a monthly trip to The Big Carrot (great natural product/ food store).

We have been using green versions of every cleaning product and I only use vinegar and water to clean with now. I am a bit of a neat/ clean freak and I am very happy with all these products. I really got into this before I started TTC because I wanted to avoid exposure to toxins as much as possible.

EC - graduation in sight?

2009-01-29T11:57:00.002-05:00

Pookie has been doing SO well with using the potty. It has been 3 weeks and I think we have had one accident - when she had a tantrum and lost control. She is even in undies while she is with my mom!! I think the next step is for me to let her have a chance to tell me when she needs to go. To get back on track after the holidays I had to remind her a lot, but now she seems to want to tell me. She will race over to me saying "poo poo, poo poo" (her word for both #1 and 2). I am just fearful of accidents. It feels so good to go so long without one, but perhaps one step back will = more steps forward.

She is still waking up with a very wet diaper in the morning, but she nurses a lot at night. I could put her on the potty, but with sleep being so poor lately I am just not interested.

Reading

2009-01-29T11:32:00.003-05:00

"A recent study commissioned by Reach Out and Read revealed that the majority of young children — 52 percent — are not being read to on a daily basis. That's 13 million children under 6 years old who are going to bed every night without a bedtime story — without the undivided, loving attention that comes with sharing a favorite book with their parents"
Dr. Barry Zuckerman, Reach Out and Read

I pulled this from someone's post on MDC. I read to Pookie everynight before bed. Usually for 30 minutes. I think should would like it if I read for an hour! She loves her books. I also try to read to her througout the day. She insists on being read to while on the potty as well.

We also are back to going to the library once a week for "Toddler Time", and while we are there we get out new books.

I think it is so important to foster a love of reading. I remember curling up with a book as a teenager and finishing it in one weekend. I loved being transported to another life. And as a little girl I looked forward to my mom reading to us everynight. I especially loved when she would read chapter books to us.

I try to read all kinds of books to Pooks. She still likes her "baby" books, with very simple pictures and text, but she also enjoys Dr. Seuss and books with fairly complex stories like "The Paper Bag Princess". I also like to find books with interesting art work. She likes "Where the Wild Things Are" and also one called "Tis a Gift to Be Simple" which has really complex artwork. She likes trying to find the animals in the pictures which are quite abstract. Her current favourites are nursery rhymes. She really enjoys those.

I am going to make a new goal of reading to her first thing in the morning and before or after her nap. She just enjoys it so much, and sometimes I feel guilty that I don't read to her more... even though she usually gets at least 45 minutes/ day.

Learning

2009-01-25T12:20:00.004-05:00

Now we are back to normal after the holidays I have been making sure we do some of her Montessori activities each day. I pulled out her mug and popsicle sticks and she did that one about 7 times in a row! It isn't challenging for her but she really enjoyed it. I have now set up open shelves with puzzles, etc. on them on the main floor and on the second floor. The basement houses all the more open-ended dramatic play toys.

I have also been making an effort to work on her ABC's. I have stapled foam puzzle ABC's on our basement wall and each day I try to do those with her. She can now recognize P and she knows "P is for Potty or pee pee. E, M & N she can also recognize, but not consistently. I try to keep it fun and when she is done with it we move to whatever she wants. We also play "What is D for... " and she will answer by saying the D sound or saying Daddy. She can do that for a few letters.

I tried doing shapes with her but she seems more into the ABC's for some reason, so that is why I chose them. Even colours she isn't too into.

She is saying more and more words now and can clearly say "mommy" instead of "mama". I think she is starting to catch up with her language. Although I don't think she was ever behind... just on the lower end of normal. The other day she even said "mommy poo poo", which was a big deal since she never has put two words together like that.

I am trying to not underestimate what she is capable of understanding and learning, but at the same time I don't want to push her or set unrealistic expectations. I just want to create an environment were she can thrive.

Zoo Day, great EC day

2009-01-25T11:59:00.007-05:00

Yesterday is was -18 celcius (0F) when we arrived at the Zoo to meet our friends and their 1 & 3 year old daughters. We haven't seen this family since Pookie was a few weeks old. They are also an AP family, so I was really looking forward to having someone to talk to that was on the same page. I was also excited to see their youngest who we have never met.

We ended up having such a nice day. Pooks was into some animals more than others. I actually thought she would be more excited than she was. Her favourite animals were definitely the Gorilla's her and the 3 year old "B" really enjoyed watching them for quite some time. I am pretty sure Pookie had the most fun holding B's hand and walking around. Seeing the two of them made me so excited for having another baby, and seeing our friends two little girls also did. I think it also got Jeff more excited about baby #2. He made a comment about wanting my sister to hurry up an decide on her wedding... so presumably we can figure out when we can start TTC. YEAH!

During lunch Pooks asked for some "boo boo" - what she has started calling nursing. It was nice to be able to nurse her and not feel awkward. The one year old also had some "boo boo" and chowed down. :P

I put Pookie in a pullup because I didn't want to chance an accident in the freezing weather. As it turned out she didn't need one. After lunch I took her pee and her diaper was still dry. And at 3pm when we were leaving she kept saying she had to go. She was all bundled up so I didn't bother taking her. I thought for sure she would just pee in her diaper, but when we got home her diaper was still dry!! This is almost 2 weeks with no accidents (except at night and at my mom's). Even at my mom's she is starting to wear her underwear and has only had accidents when waking up from naps. I am thinking... hoping she will be potty learned by 2!

Swimming and other activities

2009-01-23T11:46:00.003-05:00

Mon, Wed, Fri are my SAHM days, so I have been trying to do something with Pooks each day. This week we went to an indoor playground on Mondays. She had so much fun!! She could climb up to the area where the big slides were and she went down all the slides. She was so adventurous and independent. She didn't get in any fights or get upset. Every so often she would run over to me to check in for a hug or to take me to another section, but mostly she was happy on her own while I watched. I felt so proud... seeing her in a different situation like that and seeing her handle it so well felt really good. I think I might get a pass for 10 visits which should last until winter is over. Then we can start going to the park again.

Wednesday my mom came over, but usually my plan is to take her to the government run play centre. It is a great place, they have all sorts of toys and activities. All the toys have a purpose... whether it is dramatic play, arts and crafts or learning, numbers etc... The focus is on early learning. Pookie loves it there too.

On Fridays I have been taking her swimming in the morning which she LOVES. She got so excited today and couldn't wait to get out of the house. Today she put her face under the water a bunch of times all on her own... and she liked it!! She HATED being dunked when we did swimming with her as a baby, so I felt glad that I trusted my instincts and knew she would do it on her own time. The pool and it's deepest is not even over her head, so it is great for little kids.

On Mondays there is also booktime at the library. She loved it up to about 16 months and then she wasn't interested, but I think we will try again now she is in the older kids group. She definitely prefers being with big kids.

ECing is back on track

2009-01-16T19:04:00.004-05:00

Over the holidays we got really lazy with ECing. I stopped offering the potty, I kept her in diapers and we pretty much only got her on the potty once a day. Now I am getting more sleep and we are back to our normal routine, she is back in undies during the day. Within a couple days of being in underwear she had her first dry day! She still needs me to tell her when to go, but if the past predicts the future she should start taking the initiative again. She told my mom she had to poop when she was over there, and before bed she usually tells me she has to go. She also has woken up in the night and asked to go, and today she woke up from her nap to go.

She is 20 months now so I have changed my mentality a bit because I feel like the end could be in sight. I want to do all I can do to get her potty learned sooner than later, without putting pressure on her. For me that just means not being lazy about reminding her, and not using diapers at all during the day, even when we go out. Today I took her out in underwear. We went swimming and she peed before and after, and then we went grocery shopping and I never worried. I am hoping tomorrow will be a dry day.

The one thing I must not let myself do is get angry if she does have an accident. I am never mad at her, but I do get mad at myself, and it does no good to show that. I just have to remember that if she does have an accident she is still learning and gaining understanding of how it all works.

5 nights in a row of no "booba"

2009-01-16T18:54:00.004-05:00

Everly has now gone 5 nights without nursing to sleep. Wednesday night she did fuss, and I had to sing her A LOT of songs and nursery rhymes but she never cried. Thursday I just sang for a couple minutes, and tonight she fell asleep on her way to bed. She barely napped today and we went swimming which I think really tired her out.

Bedtime is so much better now. I really like not getting stuck lying beside her forever. She is still nursing the entire time I read, and I probably read to her for at least 15 minutes.

I am thinking that next Friday I might try to not nurse her on her first waking of the night. Whch reminds me she seems to be going back to her more normal sleeping schedule. Last night I think she woke twice and it wasn't very eventful. The night before she tossed and turned (a molar came through) but stayed in bed and didn't try to get out. I think keeping her in the room even when she wanted out the prior nights helped get us back on track.

I feel hopeful that by the time I get pregnant (6+ months from now) she might be nightweaned. I still love nursing her throughout the day and never feel like I want to stop that.

Night #2

2009-01-14T13:13:00.005-05:00

Our second night started out so well. Pooks had her bath, we got her ready for bed, and I read her 10 books again. She was so tired by the time I finished the last book. Once again I told her that the "booba's were going night night". She was upset, for maybe 5 seconds. The she put her head on the pillow and passed out in under 5 minutes!! I felt so great.

Then she woke up in the middle of the night and would not go back to sleep. She fussed, then cried, and then tantrumed. It probably took us an hour to get her to go back to sleep. DH was good though and told me to stay in the room even though he had to get up for work. He wanted to hold her while she tantrumed but I told him to let her go. He left while she let it out by the bedroom door. It only took maybe 5-10 minutes before she decided to go back in bed. She tried to fall asleep but just couldn't. It took so long, she was so restless. I noticed this morning that her bottom molar is through so perhaps it was making it's way up last night?

I wish DH would go sleep in the basement. I get so stressed knowing he is stressed about being tired for work. We actually have a spare room but the noise would carry right into it, so it is pointless for him to sleep there.

I hope tonight goes better. She still has one more molar left in this set.

First Night a Success

2009-01-13T09:24:00.002-05:00

Well I had prepared for the worst last night and it went shockingly well. We did our normal bedtime routine. I read Pookie 10 books, which is more than usual and after each book I reminded her that after we finished reading the "booba's would go to sleep." She kept saying "yeah". When we read the last book I unlatched her and she reached out and made her smacking noises she makes when she wants to nurse. I told her to go get her pillow and she did. She put her head on the pillow and I offered her some water. I turned off the lights and she just lay there. I held my breath.
Then she got a bit restless and I asked if she wanted to cuddle and she said yes. She snuggled up to me and passed out in under 5 minutes!!

Holy smokes that was EASY! She definitely remembered the routine from before when we did this. I think reading her lots of books also helped her unwine. Who knows what tonight will bring... but at least we have one very successful night under our belts.

She woke up at 11:30 and wanted out of bed. SHe didn't want to nurse, she wanted "UP!!!". Jeff was in bed at this point and together we kept her in bed. She settled down when I offered to sing Jingle Bells. I sang until she fell asleep and the rest of the night was uneventful. I felt like she remembered the night before when I wouldn't let her out because while she defintely wanted out she didn't try as hard as before.

Nightweaning Plan

2009-01-12T12:50:00.005-05:00

Pookie has been sleeping better this past week. She has still had her moments but I feel more clear in the head. For the record we do try to live as consensually as possible but I have come to realize we will never be fully consensual. It just doesn't feel right to me. Because I am aware of CL I have found the idea of any type of mother-led weaning hard. The thing is after much thought I do know what we are doing right now isn't working and is definitely not going to work with another baby. I want to give Pookie lots or lead time to the changes I would like to make before we have another baby.

I am sure after observing Pooks last night that the reason she is now getting up in the middle of the night is simply because it is fun. At first it may of been because of her teeth, but now I am very certain she is doing it because she wakes up and wants to go hang out in the basement. She woke up last night shortly after I put her to bed and threw a fit wanting to go downstairs. I just had to put my foot down. I kept the bedroom door shut and was beside her as she tantrumed. Eventually she mellowed out and came and cuddled with me until finally she fell asleep. She slept really well. So part of my new nighttime plan is that if she does wake up we don't leave the room. If DH doesn't like it he can leave!

Phase one of my nightweaning plan is to go back to not nursing her to sleep, and not nursing her until about 10pm. After 10pm I will nurse her as much as she likes. Once that goes smoothly I will extend the time by an hour or two, so we gradually go longer and longer without nursing at night. I will let her nurse all she wants while we read books, but after that I am going to put a tight shirt on she can't get into. I will sing to her, rock her, cuddle her as much as she needs.

Tonight will be the first night. I hope it goes OK!

Baby Making Plans

2009-01-12T12:42:00.002-05:00

So I had a wonderful X-mas present. On Dec 26, I finally got my first postpartum period!! Everly was 19.5 months. It felt so good to know we could start TTC. I had thought we might start in Feb or March, after a month or two of really eating well and doing the very gentle detox my naturopath suggested.

Well a few days later my younger sister got engaged! I am so happy for her, but they are planning to get married next January... in the Carribean. So... I am putting TTC plans on hold. From what I read it should be safe to travel as long as I am less than 36 weeks. That means the earliest we can start trying in June. It is a bit of a bummer, but it does give us more time to get Pookie ready... and hopefully nightweaned to some extent.

I was planning on temping right away to track my cycles, but with Pookies terrible sleep habits lately it just wasn't happening. The good news is it was SO clear to me when I ovulated this month. It was pretty amazing. My nipples got really sore, and all the other signs were there.

About 6 weeks before my period came I was starting to feel more moody. I talked to the naturopath about it. My intuition told me my cycles were going to start. It feels good to know your body that well.

Who needs a $450 kitchen when you have a husband like mine!

2009-01-10T20:23:00.004-05:00

DH really outdid himself with Pookie's Kitchen. He finished just after Christmas which actually worked out well because we were given all the accessories for it. We set it all up for her and did an unveiling. The LOVES it! We now have a little table for her where the potty is and DH is going to build her a little fridge as well. This is in one end of our dining room, but I thought it was perfect to have it there so she could work in her kitchen, while I worked in ours. She plays with it everyday.

I love that DH did the burners out of wood and made them darker just like the one I coveted. The knobs for the burners click when you turn them. I am not sure how he did that but he figured something out while he was at Home Depot. We put two RAST ikea tables together and stood them the wrong way up. The other one that we based this idea off would of been two short and way too tiny. We wanted something that would last her. Then DH put another piece of wood ontop as the counter and he worked from there. All he had was a jigsaw, and some nice guys at the depot who cut some of the wood for him.

Why I haven't been posting much

2009-01-08T10:39:00.003-05:00

I have been too tired to post. I have been having a real rough time right now with Pookie at night. This is a post I made on MDC.. I am too lazy to rewrite it for my blog.

Two months ago my DD was getting up once or twice to nurse, and many times I could barely remember nursing her as it was so uneventful.Then she started getting 6 teeth at once. Since then it has been horrible. I keep blaming it on the teething but now I am wondering if it is something else. She just has one more tooth to finish coming through and other than the nightwaking it doesn't seem to be bothering her.

Some nights I have been up with her from 1-4am. She cries and cries until I take her down to the basement, and then she will just quietly doing a puzzle, watch TV with me and then fall back asleep eventually. Last night she woke up screaming and would absolutely not stay in our room. So today we have been up since 4am. I work two days a week (today being one of them) and leave at 6am.

In the last week she is also wanting to keep my nipple in her mouth while she sleeps, which has made a back/ shoulder injury I have (from co-sleeping with her), even worse. I am a ballet teacher so it is making teaching very difficult.Last night I thought I was going to lose it. I had all these horrible thoughts and just had no patience left.

We can't keep going like this. I have no energy during the day to be a good mom, my back is getting worse which makes teaching and carrying her harder and harder. Before this all started I had begun trying to get her to stop nursing to sleep (which could be another thread). It was going OK before all this started. I feel angry that perhaps I wouldn't be in this situation if I hadn't chosen to co-sleep. No one I know has these types of problems with their toddlers. Has anyone else been through something like this?

Do you think it really is teething or something else? A year ago I posted about some sleep problems we were having and of couse I go the "this too shall pass"... but it hasn't! It has only gotten worse. Before all this I has hoping to TTC in the spring and now I can't imagine being pregnant in the near future... which makes me really depressed.

Learning

2008-12-21T13:09:00.004-05:00

I have been doing a lot of colour talk with Pookie lately and I think she is starting to get it. We have also been doing starfall.com once a day and doing the letter A and B, and she will now say the A sound when I ask what A says and same with B. I don't want to push this all on her but I do want to give her a chance to learn her colours, shapes and letters.

I was thinking once the the holidays are over each week I would pick one shape, colour and letter, and really focus on those ones. Just like when you are teaching signs. You don't stop using the other ones but you definitely focus on the ones you are trying to teach. I am hoping to make some stuffed felt letters and I thought we could play matching games with them. We could use her wooden alphabet blocks and the felt letters and match them up. We could do starfall once a day. I feel like she is just on the cusp of being really receptive to this type of thing. I guess the thing is to not get discouraged if she doesn't seem to be picking it up, because as long as she is having fun it is all good.

She is also REALLY into animals at the moment (especially horses), so I think I could seize the opportunity and show her lots of different ones. We got her more mini animals for her stocking. This time we got the canadian ones. I think she will really enjoy the moose, and deer since they look so much like horses.

Another baby... when?

2008-12-21T12:01:00.003-05:00

It seems like each week I flip flop about having another baby. The one thing that makes this decision easy is that I still haven't gotten my first post-partum period... Pooks will be 20 months on Jan 9. Anyways one day I feel so anxious because I want Pookie and her sibling to be close enough in age to play with... the next I am overwhelmed with how much Pookie is still a baby, and how she needs all my attention. Then some days I feel relaxed and just figure it will happen when it happens. I wish there was a right answer.

Unconditional Parenting by: Alfie Kohn

2008-12-21T11:54:00.004-05:00

I have been reading this book and I am really enjoying it. It was highly recommended over the mothering.com. I also bought the DVD as I thought I could get DH to watch it. It talks a lot about why punishments and rewards/ praise don't work.

In my years teaching ballet I have noticed more and more that giving kids praise or rewards only works in the short term. If you want to get them to really commit and to work hard for the right reason's it has to come from within and not be externally motivated. It has been interesting to read this different perspective and to find different ways to be a support loving parent, without constantly praising Pookie. That said it is HARD not to say "good girl" "good job". And sometimes it does feel right to give her a high five, but for the most part I try to use other alternatives such as describing. For example when she uses the potty I usually just say "you went pee pee on the potty". Lately I have been back sliding but I am trying to get back on track now that Pookie is able to understand most of what we say.

Giving up... sort of

2008-12-17T12:37:00.003-05:00

The other night I tried to put Pooks down without nursing and it was a disaster. I ended up nursing her but she was still really upset. I ended up crying because I just felt so discouraged. After thinking about it I have decided to take a much slower approach and just encourage less nursing. She is mostly sleeping in the twin bed now so that is good, in the sense that we all seem to sleep a bit better. Also when she nurses she always pops off at the end before she has fallen asleep. I have started nursing her while I am on the queen and she is in the twin. She has access to my boobs but it isn't the most comfortable. This seems to work because she seems to give up and roll over sooner. I am hoping that eventually she will start to not bother with nursing so much, and will be fine with just nursing while we read.

Her last 2 molars that are coming in now and really causing her a lot of pain. Things are rough and I just need to remind myself that soon it will pass just like is has in the past.

Commercial Toys

2008-12-15T12:58:00.002-05:00

Since I first started doing a lot of reading over at mothering.com (my favourite website), I noticed a lot of the mom's avoided branded toys. As Pookie has gotten older it is something I have looked into more. At first I just viewed toys with the characters on them as junkie. Then I started really realizing how buying one toy, book etc. with a character on it could turn into needing more and more. We have pretty much avoided all that which is easy since Pookster is so little and doesn't watch any real TV shows. One day I was doing more reading on it and someone over on mothering.com was posting about how using those types of toys inhibits creativity. When I read that it all came together, and I really felt like I finally knew really why I wanted to avoid them.

When you have a doll or action figure that is a certain character, and you child watches shows with that character, reads books with that character, it usually means they end up reinacting what they have been told that character does. When they have a no name doll, it can be anything they want it to be.

I am hoping we can avoid all that... but it is hard when people give you those items as gifts. I am pretty fortunate that the majority of people that would buy a gift for Pookie usually ask what she needs.